BONKERS || Edward Cullen

Compatible, Cry, and Conspiracy

The slightly warped audio of Celia's phone would have stopped her heart had it not been frozen already.
"Celia... Uh, its-its Jared. I was just calling to let you know that, well-uh... Well, Emily's fine. She's healing well and everything... Listen... Sam's going through a lot right now, and he- he and Paul decided that maybe, well maybe you should just take a break from coming over, you know... for now. I- I mean I'm sure it's just because he's so scared about Emily's health right now, and he doesn't want her around a v- a uh, well.. you know.. look, I'm really sorry. I thought you were really cool and I know they did, too, but it just seemed to get away from all of us that, well, you are a vampire, and we're protectors and it's just not smart for us to be all buddy-buddy... we're just not, like, compatible as friends.. you know? Agh, alright... That's it, I think. I'm sorry, Celia."
The tiniest click and silence signaled the end of the message, and for the first time Celia wished she could cry.
She longed for the prickling tears and burning nose. She yearned for warm, salty water falling down her cheeks and leaving dried up trails behind.  She craved the way her body felt as though it was collapsing on itself with each sob. She just wasn't sure how else to relieve herself of the emotions and stresses that continued to pile on.
She felt embarrassment hearing Esme shuffle around downstairs, knowing the older woman had heard the message as well. The remainder of the Cullens and Hales were at school and work.
Celia paced around Edward's room, where he had left her that morning to go to Forks High. She ran her fingers along each CD, each vinyl record, each cassette tape, and instrument.
She never did connect with music like others seemed to. It just never affected her; positively or negatively.
"Esme..?" Celia muttered, walking up behind the aforementioned woman in a room she had never seen. Esme was on her laptop writing in a binder.
She smiled at Celia, a small yet genuine smile.
"What's up?" She asked, swivelling her chair toward her.
"What do you do when you're here alone all day?" Celia asked. Esme's smile turned pitiful and motherly.
The mother-figure of the Cullen house had gone through this with the others as well.
"Celia, why don't you sit down?" Esme offered, watching Celia sit herself in the chair across from the desk. Celia had a familiar feeling in her gut and tried to push the human memories out of her brain.
"Celia, it's obviously going to be a long time before you can rejoin the public world," Esme started. "I know it can be frustrating to be cooped up, so I'm sure we have something that will entertain you, and if not we will go get whatever it is you need." Esme placed her hand over Celia's.
"I- I just never really had hobbies as a human.." Celia trailed off, once again pushing her human life from her mind while so many other vampires tried so hard to remember their own.
"Well, we can try some things! I spent decades trying to occupy my time somehow, and I finally found something that I loved to do!" She gestured toward the laptop and binder.
"What is it, exactly?" Celia questioned, leaning in to see the screen as Esme shifted it to her. It was the interior of a house.
"You decorate homes?" Celia realized, making Esme smile.
"Yep. It took me forever to figure it out, but I love doing it and I never get tired of it no matter how many centuries I spend on this planet. We just have to find something that you are passionate about as well!"

Celia stared at the canvas in front of her. She had spent hours with the paint that Esme gave her and still she found no joy in spreading it on the canvas. She thought what she painted was ugly and she didn't care about it, at all.
"On to the next thing." Esme would say.
Celia sighed and crumpled up the paper, trying again to just copy the picture in front of her, but no matter how hard she tried, the drawing of a duck never looked quite like a duck.
"On to the next thing." Esme would say.
Celia glared at the controller. Esme said Emmett loved them and would play them for days straight. Celia, however, never made a single shot and always lost, it just made her angry.
"On to the next thing." Esme would say.
Celia threw a book across the room.
Celia nearly burned the house down while cooking.
Celia flipped a monopoly board.
"Okay," Esme said, "I want to try something."
Celia followed her vampire mom back to her office. Esme grabbed the laptop and began typing before handing the laptop over. Just like every other time, Esme left her alone to feel it out for 15 minutes.

"Edward!" Esme stopped him from entering the house. He looked worriedly and searched behind her for Celia, who was no where to be seen. Esme's mind began loudly expressing her thoughts and he furrowed his eyebrows, then raised them quickly.
"Celia.." Edward knocked cautiously on his open bedroom door. Celia sat on his day bed with a laptop and papers scattered everywhere. Though she looked stressed and frantic, her mind revealed the true excitement and passion she held for the rabbit-hole in front of her.
"Edward, did you know?" She asked, innocence and wonder in her eyes, "these people have all these theories and, Edward, I can prove and disprove all of these, do you understand that?!" She was shaking with excitement as she grabbed him into a hug.
To Edward, it was such an odd thing to be so excited over, but he loved seeing her happy anyway.
"They call them conspiracies or conspiracy theories, Edward. It's amazing what people come up with!"