Maybe I Can Be Happy, Just This Once.

Two angels

It's been two weeks since dad died.
It doesn't seem real, but it is.
Sitting at school didn't seem real. Standing in the bathroom it didn't feel real. Swallowing the pills didn't seem real.

Tonight was the night.
Tonight was the night he died, and this may seem sadistic but...he's never wanted it more.
He wants to die.
He wants to die.

'I want to die.'

This morning went as usual. He didn't see Tony, I mean, of course he didn't see him. Sadly.
Peter wondered what it was like to die.
Was it peaceful for him? Was he in pain? Peter didn't believe in a god, but it was only human nature to wonder if Tony went to heaven.

He went to the kitchen, not bothering to eat anything. He didn't want to waste food, Steve needed to eat as did the rest of the avengers. Ya know, the good people.

"Hey kid, you need someone to drive you?"
Uncle Clint suggested. He was sitting at the table with Natasha, he hadn't seen them much after the funeral.
Shaking his head Peter went to grab his backpack.
"Peter you do realize the school calls when you don't show up right?" Natasha said, her perfectly arched brow was raised, no smile on her face. Showing she was disappointed. Or hopefully uncaring.

Uh oh.

Peter didn't show anything on his face though. Being a depressed kid at school really taught him how to mask his emotions.

"Yeah and?"
He knew he said it with an attitude, he didn't mean to he just...kinda did?
Clint raised his brows in surprise, looking between Natasha and Peter.

"And you do know that to many absences not only causes your grades to lower but causes Steve to go to court to pay your ticket?"

Rolling his eyes, "Whatever fine, just drive-"

He realizes his mistake five seconds to late.

He rolled his eyes.

At Natasha.

Maybe his morning didn't go as usual.

She gave him her 'I would have killed you if I didn't love you' look standing up she said,
"Make sure he gets to school Clint."

On the drive to school, Clint tried making small talk.

"You were kind of rude to her back there don't you think?"

"So?"

Clint looked back at him, giving him an incredulous look, before looking back at the road.
"Peter she could have killed you with her pinky, but she didn't. Because she loves you okay? And so do I."
Peter looked out the window, they really don't make suicide any easier do they?

He was quiet at school. It wasn't unusual either.
He had slowly stopped talking to his friends. He still sat with them but they talked to each other. He didn't mind either.
Flash just made his day too. The name calling, the beatings, the insults. It just made his day so much better.

This is why he skipped school. He didn't have to deal with this shit. He usually went to the graveyard where they buried may and uncle Ben. Or on really dark days he went to visit Tony. It was just like reopening a wound when he visited Tony  though.

When he got home he went straight to his room. He still had his room next to Tony's. He walked by it, staring at it for a few seconds then running to his room.