No matter how much i tried nothing worked... I used to be this person that was just all giggles and smile. But now that the divorce happened my face still had a smile but it was all just a cover up. My dad had noticed I wasn't the same any more and went on a hunt for a counselor. It wasn't just me that needed one my sister also wasn't handling this well. While waiting for a counselor to pop up my sister and i leaned on each other.
Before the divorce happened we would argue all the time and never really had a strong relationship. Our relation went to a whole other level that year. In this period in my life even though i was hurting it made me realize that I'm not as open as i seem.... I took all of that pain and held it inside, letting nobody know how weak i really was. I would never let anybody see me crying and just buried myself deep inside... thinking the pain would go away this way. The way my mom betrayed my family made me so closed in.
My dad eventually found a counselor, but it was a guy. Both my sister and I had wanted a girl counselor, but this was the best person my dad could find. The first time we went to see him i was very quiet... I didnt like to talk about this stuff with my family, let alone a guy i didnt know. My dad really thought this would help so we continued going. Eventually i opened up, but whenever he asked me something that made me uncomfortable I would always launch into talking about my animals. Dont ask me why that was what i talked about but it was and that never changed.
Eventually he started to ask me the normal questions.... he even gave me a chart to fill out with how i felt. Nobody in my family ever suspected i was so deeply depressed, and it stayed that way
~Author Note~
Thanks for reading.... this is a very sore subject for me but i think its time i let everyone know who the real me is. Everything i have written so far is true and I will try to continue that. Incase yall were wondering i am 13 and this is about me personally.... It really helps to know that people are getting to see the real me... Please keep reading and tell me what you think of my tortured life and you can even inbox me your own experiences if you want.... Well bye for now
- Victoria " the tortured soul"
