Catch me

Intro

I should have known that this was all gonna fall. It was too good to be true. My happiness had been built up to high all it took was a pin to be dropped when it all tumbled over. I'm used to it I can survive a fall. I was to tired this time I couldn't get back up. Luckily you were at the bottom to help me but why couldn't you have been there to catch me.

It all repeats like a broken record. New home, something bad happens, then i get sent back again like a broken toy.  I had been orphaned as a baby actually at one day old. All it took was one look at me to realize I wasn't worth living. The rain on the car window only added to my numb aesthetic. It seems every time I go to a new home it likes to rain. It's like the sky is crying for me sense i can't seem to do it myself. The air was stale and the low roar of the air conditioning gave it a whole surreal feeling. I'll never get tired of the feeling on the ride to one of these places. Apparently my new foster home was different from the others. I feel like that's just something they say so i don't loose hope or throw a fit about going. If that is the real reason it's stupid I lost hope awhile ago and I don't talk let alone throw a fit. That's how people can take advantage of you but if I don't talk or fight back they have nothing to work with. I heard the house was huge and id have my own room which i'm actually looking forward to. It'll give me a place to hide out in. I'm currently seventeen and if I can make it through this by just avoiding everyone then I'll be able to leave when I'm eighteen. It feels weird driving through these streets I've been moved around a lot but somehow I ended up back here. The small wooded town I was supposedly born in. Usually when you give away something that's broken you don't try to get it back. Wrong. There was something about this new foster home i was going to. It's actually not new at all. I was born there, gaven away there. I can't even fathom why someone would go through all this trouble to get me back. Yup, my new foster parents are actually my biological parents. It's all so stupid and aggravating to me. I get getting me out of there but why take me back. It wasn't a mistake either because they've been looking for me not only that but i have siblings so they don't need to adopt it's not like they can't have children. I don't want to be apart of whatever family they have going on. I don't want a family not yet I couldn't handle it. I don't even understand how they got the go ahead to adopt me. If you think about it they gave me away once whats gonna stop them from doing it again. It also states on my form that I don't do good with people but there are more than fifty people living with them?! There house has to be huge maybe they own a hotel. It makes sense seeing as they would have to have a lot of connections to find me in the first place. I really don't want to do this every minute that passes I feel a heavier weight added to my shoulders. The overwhelming fear of getting judged by these people again. I held what little stuff I had close. Most of my stuff has been ruined or taken away but that's ok. It's actually better to pack light for quick getaways and not many sentimental things. I've never been given much having to mostly work for what little clothes I had. I grip the door handle to the car thinking that maybe if I open it and jump I can get away or better yet hit by a car. The farther we go the less houses I see. Great were in the middle of nowhere that's always a good sign. I like the social worker I got to drive me because he's not a talker. I'm not either but if he doesn't stop texting and driving in a second I'm gonna be. My back aches causing me to shift up and out of my corner. I can tell were close by the shoe marks in the gravel saying people live close by and were out here recently. I can do this I've made it this far I can't give up now. I pull the strap over my shoulder sense the other strap got pulled off a while ago. We come to a slow stop in front of the biggest house I've probably ever seen. How do they even afford this? I pray for my hands to stop shaking I push open the door. This is it then your done no more pain just one year with your birth parents aaaand about 48 others.