Till Death Do Us Part

Day Six

Dear Harry,

Sorry for the messy writing today , were on our way back to London from your moms place .

I didnt get very much sleep last night so it doesn't help the whole moving car and writing thing but as zayn would say "Tell me when i give a mother f*****."

I finally had a proper meal for breakfast this morning, only because your mom made me but it still counts in my mind .

I havent cried sence we first got to your moms , which i think is a win, win me being an ugly crier and all an hating crying in front of people that aren't you .

I go to treatment tomorrow the second time in three years , I still can't believe liam is making me go, it's a waste of money if you ask me, but when ever i tell him that i get the whole daddy directioner speech.

" louis, you should know better then to say or think that. It's okay to need help once and a while and this so happens to be the time you need it most ...... blahblahblah blahblahblah blahblahblah"

Well thats liam for you .

5 days , 13 hours and 36 minutes. Yes i've been keeping track . Dont hate me or tell anyone, or try to stop me but the 94 day ,23 hour of the day, the 11th minute , is the day i plan to see you again no matter what .

The Dr. Said to keep track how much I weigh every day so i don't go back in the eating disorder stage of depression.

147 pounds to this day i've only lost 12 pounds I think im doing good keeping the weight on so she doesn't notice.

skin still itchy but haven't cut.

some suicidal thoughts.

treatment regularly.

A "smile" on my face.

I say im coping pretty good wouldn't you harry ?

November 29th 2014 , 16 more days till i read the letter.

Always in my mind, heart, and soul .

Love,

Your loubear