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4/6/18
{third-person pov}


it was a slow day for business at jang mi's shop. she was lazily leafing through an old magazine, head in hand. kyung tae was playing behind the counter with her. she looked back and smiled at her son.

her son.

of course, kyung tae, being four years old , forgot about last night like other kids would have. he wasn't even worried that yesterday might have been the last time he was ever going to see his father.

"eomma?"

"oh?"

"can we go get cookie dough ice cream later?"

god, he loves cookie dough just like his father, jang mi thought.

"sure, we'll close the shop early today. nobody seems to be in a shopping mood today. i don't have any prescriptions to fill anyway. everybody's picked theirs up for the week, so i think we can close..." jang mi untied her apron that she wore around the store. she hung it on a hook next to her desk. the envelope from taehyung sat on her desk, waiting to be ripped open. she shook her head and grabbed a broom to sweep up before she closed.


the bells rang as someone walked through the door.

jang mi automatically said: "hi, welcome to dae don pharmacy." she didn't look to see who it was.

"appa!" kyung tae shrieked from behind the pharmacy counter. he ran out of the office and toward who came in.

"what?" jang mi mumbled to herself, walking over.

taehyung walked with a certain look in his eyes toward the pharmacy counter, but slowed down as kyung tae flung himself at taehyung.

"m-mwo? a...ppa? ani..." he trailed off as kyung tae gave him a hug.

"i missed you appa." kyung snuggled into tae's arms.

jang mi watched from behind a rack of chips. taehyung was shocked, naturally, as this was his son, meeting him for the first time, touching him for the first time.

his son.

"kyung tae. i think you have something wrong, i'm not your appa..." taehyung tried to make him let go. he looked to be in pain.

"but eomma cries when she sees you dancing on the tv!" kyung tae grabbed his father's hand.

taehyung looked around for jang mi.

"she told me that my father is famous! she told me that he was the most ethereal person she's ever met! and not to mention handsome. but she always seems sad when father's day comes around."

the look in taehyung's eyes became frantic. "where are you jang mi?" he whispered to himself under his breath.

"huh?" kyung popped.

"where's jang mi? where's your eomma?" taehyung seemed like he was on the verge of tears. he was sitting on the floor, hands still intertwined with kyung's.

jang mi slowly emerged from behind the rack of chips. "i'm right here, tae."

it hurt her to take every step toward him, remembering every step he took walking away from her.

she squatted in front of him and wiped his tears.

"i'm so sorry jang mi. i'm a terrible person for leaving you. i should have never abandoned you because of my career." he started to apologize.

"taehyung, i don't think this is the right time or—" jang mi started to get up.

"i have to do it now. because i'll hate myself forever if i don't apologize. i know you already hate me, and i know this apology isn't going to change that but please hear me out." he grabbed her hand.


kyung tae slowly backed away from his parents, letting them have some space. he sat on the bottom shelf just in earshot.


"okay, fine." she sat opposite him.

taehyung took a shaky breath. "i'm sorry for everything. i know i hurt you, kyung tae, your parents, my parents, and everyone we love. i know nothing is going to change the past, but i want our future to change. i can't deal with the guilt i feel from leaving you behind. i know that's selfish, and i was—i am, but i need you to function."

"i put my shirt on backwards one day because i couldn't stop thinking about you." he cry-laughed.

"i write journal entries every day because that was the only way i could talk to you. you ignored me everywhere, understandably so."

"i hate for popping into your life again because i know it's so cliché and unfair," he wiped at his nose, "but i am so so sorry. you never even accepted the money i sent you. you always sent my letters and birthday cards back."

jang mi stayed silent.

"i'm not asking you to forgive me. i'm not even asking you to give me a chance, unless you want to. i'm just asking you to let me see kyung tae. i've missed so much of his life already and i can't miss any more. i regret everything i did, except for having him with you, which i never got to see because i was being a jerk but anyway,"

"i want to be with you and kyung tae. but i can't. at least, not now."

jang mi traced circles into the carpet.

"i have this memory of you in my mind, that one time you slept over when we were seventeen, and i went to go make breakfast—which was eggo waffles by the way—and i came back to check on you and you grab me by the arm and pull me back into bed and start playing peek-a-boo beneath my covers. that was and is the most beautiful thing i've experienced, being in love with you, that morning, every time you held my hand, fucking lent me a pencil in math class, every thing you did, made me fall in love with you. i still am in love with you."

"you probably don't love me anymore, and i can change that if you would let me, but god knows how stubborn you can be..." taehyung smiled sadly.

"but please let me love kyung tae."

jang mi gazed off into space, leaning on her hands. taehyung waited for a response.

"not now?" she asked, still staring off into space.

"i have a tour. i have three days left here in daegu. i wasted one of them by being a chicken yesterday. the last three all depend on how you and kyung feel."

"you know? you're actually stupid. you leave me on the street, pregnant, with your child! you didn't even give a damn about the mother of your child. i thought the power, fame, and money wouldn't have gotten to your head, but it obviously has. congratulations, you've been forgiven. as for seeing kyung tae, let him decide his fate."

your child.

"kyung tae?" taehyung called out for the small boy.

"i want to see appa, eomma. i know you are mad at appa for leaving, but you need to give him a chance. he said sorry, he tried to support you, he tried to be there in the ways he knew how. i'm letting him into my life, eomma. you can do whatever." kyung tae waddled over, standing between jang mi and taehyung.

"i forget you're four years old sometimes. come give eomma a hug." they hugged, smiles and hair displaced all over.

taehyung looked on in envy of himself, knowing that those two people might be his one day.

kyung tae hugged taehyung again, this time, their rectangular smiles matching while looking at one another.


and what about jang mi? well, jang mi still needed to find out how not to fall in love with taehyung again.


god forbid her life becomes a cliché.

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