Moving Forward (Completed)

Chapter Four

Rafael had picked her up straight from leaving work. Katherine knew he would still be in a suit, so she decided to put on a black dress that looked like she could have left the same office he had. She rarely dressed like this for her own work seeing as she was surrounded by nine and ten year olds for most of the day. During the school year she wore slacks and a variety of dress shirts and blouses, occasionally jeans if they were allowed to, and every once in a while she'd wear a dress... usually picture day, beginning of the year conferences with parents, or open house. During the summer she mostly wore jeans and sometimes a sun dress, though her current favorite part about not being married to Scott was the fact that if she stayed in and worked on lesson plans or watched Netflix... sometimes both, she could wear her pajama's all day judgement free.
"You look nice." Rafael had smirked when he picked her up.
"So do you."
This whole flirting thing was getting easier. The talking in general was getting easier, but that didn't mean the butterflies were gone. She had changed three times and cleaned every surface of her apartment by the time he had arrived. The nervous cleaning was something she had mixed feelings about. She knew that it was a hold over from Scott's constant nagging, but she also really liked how clean her apartment was.
"Can I ask..." Rafael paused as he watched her take a sip of the martini she had ordered, "actually... never mind."
"About my divorce? May as well rip the bandaid off right?"
"Yeah..." Rafael bit his lip to hide the smile he was fighting at her candor.
"I wish I could say we just drifted apart, but that would only be partially true." She sighed. "The truth is I was miserable, so miserable that I packed up my things and left. Which in hindsight feels kind of shitty, but I would have never left if I hadn't."
"Why is that?"
"Scott would have convinced me I was overreacting... he always made me feel like I was crazy or being irrational if I complained about something. There was no talking through issues to try to fix them... everything had to be his way or it was wrong."
"He sounds controlling."
Katherine snorted as she tried not to laugh. "Controlling is putting it mildly."
"So you just left?"
"He woke me up one morning after a particularly bad fight the night before, and basically called me lazy and useless, asking if I was going to sleep all day. This was at six in the morning the first week of summer break mind you. I didn't want to argue, so I got up. He was gone for work by the time I got out of the shower. I stood in the kitchen drinking cup after cup of coffee, just staring at a home that I no longer felt comfortable in."
"He sounds like a winner." Rafael huffed, bringing his scotch to his lips.
Katherine immediately felt the need to justify the relationship, feeling stupid for letting it get as bad as it had. "It didn't start out that way. If anything he was overly attentive. I thought I was being so cautious... I had been in relationships that dwindled after years. Where you were just no longer interested in the same things and ended up going your separate ways. I had always said that I wouldn't get married unless I had dated the person for at least three years, that being the length of my longest relationship prior to Scott. It was three and a half years before we got engaged, four before we were married. He had always been a bit stubborn... we both were, but he changed after we got married. That's when he became unyielding, day by day chipping away at the person I used to be. Truthfully, there had been signs that I should have seen, but..."
"Like what?"
"I move in with him around year three. We didn't find a place together, I just moved into his home and he liked things a certain way. I felt like a guest at first, so I wanted to make the transition smooth and changed myself to fit his needs... setting a precedent I guess." She sighed.
"Men like that know what they're doing. They get in your head and make you feel guilty for just being yourself, instead of bending in anyway to accommodate who you are."
"Professional or personal experience?" Katherine asked. The way he had spoken made her feel it was the latter.
"My father."
"And you couldn't just leave..."
"My mom could have, but it's not as easy as that is it?" He smiled and Katherine exhaled a breath she hadn't known she was holding.