“I hate you!” Jack screamed.
The words shot straight into Alex’s heart.
I hate you.
This wasn’t the sort of “I hate you” he said after Alex would take his phone or steal the remote.
This one was serious.
It wasn’t said in the heat of the moment, either. You could tell it had been planned. Jack knew what he was saying, and he meant it.
Alex broke away from his thoughts to look up at him, and what he saw killed him.
Jack’s cheeks were damp with soft tears; this was hurting him just as much.
The older boy reached out to his weeping boyfriend – or, now ex-boyfriend –, and Jack quickly pulled his arm away.
“Don’t fucking touch me, Alex. Never touch me, and never come near me again!” His voice broke at the end, his sobs coming out now in short pants.
“No, Jack, please. You don’t understand –“ He started, but was soon cut off.
“No, I understand. I understand perfectly. You led me on for weeks, Alex, for months. You told me all of these sweet nothings, you texted me every morning and every night. You did all of these things that you knew would make me fall in love with you. You did it just so you could hook up with another guy and make me feel like shit!”
They locked eyes, the weight of the moment finally hitting him as tears started to fall gently down his pale face.
“That not… That’s not it, at all. I never wanted to make you feel anything less than perfect. Jack, I swear, you are honestly the most amazing guy I have ever met, and that’s why I hooked up with him,” Alex laughed bitterly, “I thought you didn’t feel the same way. I was so attached to you, Jack. So attached – and I realized that, if you left me, I would have nothing. So I tried getting over you. I tried flirting with other people, but I never got the same feeling that I get when I’m around you. God, Jack, you… You just make me feel so complete, and I though I was just another guy to you. Being just ‘another guy’ isn’t good enough for you, or for me. You deserve the absolute best, so I can’t let you be my addiction; I can’t let you become my entire world, because I’ll never give you the kind of feeling you give me.”
There was a long pause before Jack spoke again.
“So… Do you love me?” He asked slowly.
“It wouldn’t matter if I did, anyway.” Alex choked out.
“That’s the only thing that matters. Do you love me?” He tried again.
“More than anything.”
