Oasis skies

Chapter 2

***

I'm having a bad day.

My mind is a whirlwind. I'm itching to cut myself - if I don't, i know i might blow up. I rock myself back and fourth, desperate to comfort myself. Tears of frustration seep out of my eyeballs burning angry red trails into my flesh.

That's when the door opens.

I thought it was a nurse at first. Not looking up, I cry even harder. They get angry when i cry- they say i need to stop being a baby.

However, no words come. The room remains silent. I look up, warily and very slowly. My heart beat picks up speed, viciously thumping in my chest.

It's just a boy.

He's hauntingly beautiful. He is like a whisper of cool breeze, crossing against your body and spiralling against you.

He seems unreal. Like he would fade away if you were to touch him.

Everything about him is pale- like porcelain- and yet unbearably perfect. His ash blonde hair blends seamlessly with his snow white skin. His eyes are piercing; a perfect blend in light blue and grey, like a stormy ocean.

He doesn't look like he belongs here. He has lean muscle covering his body, his lips are full and pink. On top of that, he isn't accompanied by a nurse.

He shouldn't be here.

I'm going to hurt him. I'm going to destroy his perfect skin and his perfectly tousled hair. It's just what I do.

I'm a monster.

I begin to panic. I'm going to hurt him. They are going to hurt him. I can feel the anger and the violence raising up like bile.

Just one more second and my mind will be taken over. One more sec -

No.

I'm going to control myself.

I curl into a ball and do the one thing that calms me down.

I sing.

Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
in a champagne supernova
In the sky...

"Oasis, right?" I jolt upright, startled by the voice after months of silence. Not wanting to speak, I simply nod at him and turn back around. I expected conversation to die down after that, but instead he said, "Sing again."

"Why?" I manage to croak out.

"Because you have a beautiful voice." I stare directly into his pale blue-grey eyes, they're hypnotising, drawing me in, entangling me with their beauty.

Once I snap out of my trance, I meet him with a chuckle. "No I don't." I say, still laughing softly.

"And why would you say that?" He queries, tilting his head slightly.

"My voice is a voice that belongs to a monster ." I say quietly.

We stare at each other, and I find myself studying his features. His feathery locks, his blue-grey orbs. I even allow my eyes to roam his body. His lean, yet still muscular frame, his long legs; even though he is sitting down, I could tell that he's tall.

I find myself envious of his obvious beauty. Even his teeth are perfect.

I'm no looker, and it's no secret.

I have a spindly frame and messy brown hair that swoops naturally across my forehead. I have pale skin and dull brown eyes; I barely got any attention back when I was normal. Regardless of this, I still miss being normal.

We've been staring at each other for a while now.

I know it's weird but I just can't help it.

"I don't think you're a monster." His voice runs through his lips like smooth honey- calm, warm. "If you sing," he speaks, his voice full of purpose, "I'll sing with you"

My breath catches in my throat. I'll sing with you.

He'll sing with me.

No. I can't sing with him. That is something I reserve for my mother. It's sacred- it's special.

I know my mum doesn't want me. The nurses tell me that. Don't get the wrong idea though, they don't actually say it. I can just tell. They throw me pitiful glances and winced every time I mentioned her.

Note the word mentioned.
Past tense, I know.

I gave up asking about her a while ago. To be specific, it was probably around the time of my first year in my last hospital.

I've been transferred from hospital to hospital, proving to be 'too much' for each one. The last one, I shouldn't have had that knife, the one before that, I shouldn't have been left alone with that many meds. The list goes on, each event proving that I am a disappointment, that I'm too dangerous to be alive.

I remember when I was a good boy. It was like flying, everyone loved me, and I loved everyone. They called me little angel. Something was bound to go wrong, and something did.

My wings broke.

Something inside me snapped; soon that little angel was nothing but a demon, a monster that deserves to die.

Nothing has changed. I am still a monster, I still deserve to die.
Everywhere I go, I cause destruction. I am a liability. My mother thought so, that's why she left me. She was scared of me, I know it, she probably stills is. I wonder if the boy knows what's wrong with me. Probably not, he'd be running for the hills if he did.

"Are you gonna sing it with me or what?" His words snap me out of my trance.

Silently, I shake my head and glumly walk over to my bed. I lie down, facing him.

He is perched on one of the visitors chairs, staring blankly. It's strange, looking at someone and not being... angry?

I can't really explain how I feel towards some people. It's just, when I look at them, I can't breathe and my head starts to throb, like I'm at the very bottom of the ocean.

But when I look at him, it's different.

My chest is all fluttery and my head is all floaty.

I can't breathe, but in a good way.

My train of thought grinds to a halt when I hear it. A beautiful melody. Soft to the ears, like a beautiful song bird or an angel.

I realise the boy is singing, but I don't care because the sound alone is enough to send me to sleep.

Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a champagne supernova
In the sky...

***
Word count: 1064 words ❤️

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