Star Wars: The Deadly Virus

Chapter II

The Jedi and Jar Jar headed over to the Jedi Council War Room to converse with Yoda.

"Arrived you have. Been waiting for you patiently, I've been trying to."

"Sorry. Jar Jar tripped on some the slime while he was meditating. What is it you wanted to see us about so early?"

"Arrived, a new Sith has. Very powerful he is."

"Do you know his name?"

"Know who he is, I do not. Find out soon, we will."

"Exsqueeze me. Meesa think you are looking for the wrong."

Yoda and Obi Wan stared at him.

"Wrong Padawan, you have got" said Yoda, and started chuckling.

"I must've had a few too many bottles of Skatta when I made that decision, Master Yoda" said Obi Wan, who watched as Jar Jar stumbled around and tripped over cushions and chairs.

"Youch! Meesa no like being tripped on."

"Great General he supposedly was. Doubt it, I do."

Yoda suddenly closed his eyes like he was meditating. Obi Wan walked over to him and said "what visions are you seeing now, Master?"

"Great disturbance in the food supply, I see. Tampered with it, somebody has. Go investigate it you two must."

"Master Yoda, I don't think that would be a very clever idea. Especially since I am 37 years old and Jar Jar is an idiot."

"Go find disturbing thing, you must. Leave me alone, you will."

"Where might you suggest we look?"

"Coruscant, I see. Go there, you must."

"But Master, we are already there."

"Go away, you must. Leave me, you will."

"You know, why don't you ever have the other members of the council investigate stuff? Why is is always me?"

"Understand, you do not. The Chosen One you might not be. But chosen for this specific task you are."

"Alright, I will do what I must. Come on Jar Jar." Obi Wan turned around and saw that Jar Jar was carrying a plate of tea. "Meesa was getting drinks for yousa."

"Very thoughtful of you, Jar Jar. But I'm afraid those might be poisoned. I will do a scan of them on the ship."

Jar Jar looked disappointed. "It is very good tea."

"I'm sure it was. But it's bad tea. Drink too much, and it stirs up too much of the midichlorians. They won't react right."

Jar Jar again looked disappointed. "I have to take a doo doo. I'll be right back, Master Obi."

Jar Jar ran off, accidentally dropping all of the tea on the ground, destroying them. He won't be able to get a sample of the poison if they are spilled on the ground.

He found a quiet place to talk to his dark master. "Meesa first attempt has failed."

"You pink idiot. Why did I think this was a good plan? Do you still have some poison?"

"On the ship, yes. Meesa still has some."

"I want you to use those vials..."

"Oh wait a minute. Meesa destroyed them all."

"All of them?!"

"Yes."

"There were millions of them that I securely hid in that ship. How did you destroy every single one of them?"

"Meesa clumsy."

"I'd be better off hiring Plagueis. And he's dead!"

"Not to mention he hates yousa's guts."

"I have only one more option to the plan. Deathsticks. I will put the poison in those and feed them to the Jedi."

"Why deathsticks?"

"Because it's better than anything you could come up with."

"Point well taken."

"I will supply you with these Deathsticks on your trip. Have a safe flight and make sure everyone dies."

"Everyone?"

"Well. Everyone except me and you. Unless you turn on me and thrown me down a shaft or cut me in half. But that will never happen."

"Meesa no see that happening to you ever. Safe in meesa's hands you are."