"Just Friends"

Chapter 12

3 MONTHS LATER

*Saffron's POV*

Ever since I left Colby to live with Jason for a while, I've had dreams about grace and Colby and mark.... even Sam. Mark passed away last week and Jason hasn't left his room since then. the only time he does leave is to let me know he's alive in the morning. He goes down to grab some food and quickly brings it back up. He's been wearing the same sweatshirt ever since he went back to the hospital. today was marks funeral. I couldn't sleep all night. I got up and took a quick shower. Knowing Jason didn't want to be disturbed, I let him alone just for today. It was hard for both of us and I've only known him for three months. It sucks too. He was a great kid. I put on my black dress along with some flats. I walked to Jasons room. His tie wasn't tied but layed on his neck, his hair was a mess, and he wasn't fully dressed. He was crying. His face his behind his big red hands. Seeing him upset made me cry. I walked over to him and pulled him up. Without saying a word, he threw himself on top of me and cried into my shoulder. He was bent over since he was so much taller than me. He sobbed loudly. He said, "Why did this have to happen to him." I stood quiet. I shrugged. "Something's happen for a reason, Jason..." "He was such a good kid. He was there through every break up. He was the best friend I never had and... now he's gone..." He cried. And cried. Harder. and harder. I said, "If Mark was here, he wouldn't want you to be like this. Don't you wanna stay strong for your bestfriend?" He took himself off me and sat down, pulling me next to him. He said, "Its not that simple... Have you ever lost a best friend?" He brought me back to grace. Grace was a lot like Mark. Except she didn't have cancer. She was kind hearted. She was there when nobody else was... other than Colby. "Remember Grace?" I asked. He nodded. "I lost her.... not the same way you lost mark but... She always had a guy over and it became too much for me so I left." Tears and mascara stained my face. "We have to leave in a few..." I stood up and wiped my face. He hugged me again.

During the car ride, Jason wasn't talking. The music was off. The windows were up. Everything was silent. I followed close behind the other cars going to the funeral with his blinkers on. His fingers were intertwined in mine. we both struggled to swallow. "I'm so sorry...." I whispered. He said "Its not your fault, Sweetheart..." "I know... but I feel bad..." "Don't feel bad... I have you..." He held onto my hand tighter and focused on the road.

We pulled up to the church. "Are you ready?" I asked. He was hunched over the steering wheel and crying. "Jason..." I whispered. "Just gimme a minute..." He replied. We sat in the quiet car for about 5 minutes. Both of us were crying. More than the people that were apart of his family. He got out the car and walked to my side. I got out and immediately hugged him tight. My arms wrapped around his waist and my head was burried in his chest. His arms were on my back. His heart beat was slow. "Jason..." I heard a voice. He let me go and turned towards a woman. "Mom..." He whispered. He hugged her and pulled my are. "Mom this is Saffron... Saffron this is my mom, Jen." She walked up to me with open arms. "Thank you for making my son so happy.." She cried. "I'm sorry for your loss." I replied. "It's okay..." She let me go and looked up. "He's in a better place now... Right Jason..." He wiped his face and nodded. "We should get inside.." I followed Jason and his mom inside.

--4 hours later--

I walked into Starbucks and waited until I was next.

"I can help the next person." A redhead called. I walked up and looked at the menu.

"I'll just have a grande berry refresher please.." I said, searching for my card. I gave him the card and waited for my drink. My head was down. I was looking at my phone when I bumped into a tall figure. "Oops sorry." I said, finally looking up at the stranger. "Hey saffron." It was Colby. "C-Colby... What are you doing here?" I stuttered, picking up my phone. "Just getting something here... How ya been?" I looked around and shrugged. "I've been better" I said. "My... How was the funeral?" I stepped back. "How'd you know about that?" "Sam told me..." He simply replied. "It was sad.." I said in a duh voice. "Right.. That was a bad question." He chuckled. My heart beat got faster. I missed Colby a lot. Being around Jason made me forget abou him and what we had... But now that he's right in front of me I remember our first time like it was yesterday. That's creepy for me to say but... It's true. He looked me I'm the eyes. I stepped a little closer, to where I had to tilt my head back all the way. I went on my tip toes. "Saffron!" My head shot towards the man who called my name. I picked up my cup and headed towards the door. "Saffron wait!" Colby grabbed my arm. "What?" "Uh... do you wanna maybe come over and talk for a little..." I got lost in his eyes. I gave in and smiled. "I'd love that..." "awesome... Uh... I won't be able to pick you up" "okay... that's fine" He held the door open and walked me to my cad. "I'll see you later..." I sat in my car and whatched as he walked back into Starbucks.

I sat there for a while, thinking about how things could've gone differently if I didn't leave him. I started the car. What I was about to do didn't feel right. most people wouldn't go back but... every time I see Colby, I fall harder and harder. Even if he wasn't mine. But how was I supposed to tell Jason about this.

I looked around, realizing I was about five minutes away from the house. It was fucked up for me to go to a funeral with my boyfriend then afterwards go out with someone I haven't even seen in three months... which felt like years. Especially after I just say Colby and almost kissed him.

The red light turned green. I panicked. I drove slowly and tried to stay as calm as I could. I drove up to the neighborhood and took the longest way home. After doing some thinking, I figured put what I was going to say. I quickly drove home. my head was pounding. I opened the door and walked to Jason's room. I lightly knocked on the door and looked through the crack. He was laying down on his bed with his head burried under a pillow. It hurt to see him like this. I sat on the edge of his bed and rubbed his back. "C'mon Jason..." "Saffron I can't" "Yes you can, sweetheart... I believe in you." He sat up and looked me on the eyes. They were red and puffy. He brought his knees to his chest and placed a pillow in between. He hugged his knees. He said, "Thanks for being there..." "Anything for you. Hey listen.... Around six I'm gonna go out with some friends to... get my mind off things." "Okay... I should do the same." I softly smiled and kissed his cheek.