It's Only You

Chapter 8

I wake up and it's still dark in my room. I wonder what time it is but I feel like I didn't had any sleep at all. I get my phone and look at the time, it's 3 am. I sigh and lay down on my bed again. I try to sleep again but I can't. I'm too tired to sleep.

I decide to get some drink downstairs. To my surprise the light of the living room is still on and I walk in. I see my mom sitting on the floor with a book in her hand. What is she still doing up?

"Mom?" I ask and she turns around. Her eyes are red like she cried. She doesn't says a word and looks down to her book again. I walk closer and see what is it. The wedding pictures from my mom and dad. I say nothing and sit next to her on the ground.

"Mom what are you doing?" She looks at me. "I miss him." I sign, I thought we were over this. I get the photo album and stand up. "Mom stop it he is not good for you and you deserve much better. He is gone and there is nothing you can do about it." I say harsh. She needs to stop thinking about him.

She looks in my eyes and shakes her head. "He was my only love and I can't stop thinking about him." Tears stream down her face. I'm used to this, my mom had these days to back home. She crashes down and there is nothing you can do about it.

I walk to the kitchen to get some water and had it to my mom. She doesn't takes the water and lays on the ground. "Mom stop it! Stop thinking about dad and get over it! I understand you loved him. Look at you, you are crying on the ground looking at your wedding pictures. He broke you, mom. Don't crawl back to him everytime you think you miss him. You don't miss him you just miss the love he gave you. But you know what mom, Jade and I are here to and if that's not enough for you.."

I feel the tears burning in my eyes and try to blink them away. I wait for her to say somethin but instead she just sits there watching me. "Jade and I are always here. When you break down again Jade and I always catch you and you don't see the things we are doing here for you. I know it's hard but atleast try to be happy and get some distraction."

I've asked my mom a thousand times to get a job or to make some friends. It feels like me and Jade are taking care of mom, instead the other way around. My mom is a mess and she doesn't sees it.

I walk to the end of the room. I'm done with dealing with this. I want to walk to my room but I hear my mom talk. "You think this is hard for you, Andrea? This is my life stop thinking you can fix it cause you don't. I don't need a job, I don't need friends. I just want to be alone!"

"This isn't who you are mom! You are acting like a child. I offer you help but you don't want it. I hate seeing you like this. You are my mom of course I want to see you happy! I hate my mom seeing like this but I hate the most that I lost my mom!"

My mom walks to me and before I know it her hand hits my cheek. She stands there looking confused like she doens't know what she just did. I'm in shock from what she did. "You know what mom, you are just like dad. Go make your life a mess, I'm not here anymore."

I walk to the front door and walk outside. I have no idea where I'm going. I don't care. I start running and feel the tears streaming down my face. It feels like hours running like this. I slow my pass down and I notice I've run along the lake. The cold wind blows against my skin. It's too dark to look for. There are no lamps here.

I find a spot close to the water and sit down. I try to catch my breath and I feel myself calming down. How could my mom? I tried to help her and she doesn't cares at all. My tears have been tried by the wind and I notice it's getting really cold.

The lake looks beautiful. The moonlight makes the dark shy light up. Across the lake I see a few lights. I don't know what to do. I don't want to go home. I lay down in the cold grass and look to the stars. It's a clear night and I don't see a cloud in the sky.

I think about home. About Sarah. If I was still home I could go to Sarah. I could sleep there and she would make me laugh. I smile thinking about the stupid things we've done together. We had so much fun together and she feels like a second sister to me. We would sing, well actually scream, the songs that were playing on the radio. We would dance together if one of our favorite songs comes up.

A tear comes up in my eyes again. I wish I could go home.

"Andrea?" I hear a voice say. I jump up. It's Harry. "Oh my god you scared me." Harry smiles weak. "Sorry" I sit down again and look to the water again. Harry sits next to me and he does the same. We don't say anything and I wonder what he's thinking about.

"What are you doing here at 4 am?" Harry asks "Had a fight with my mom and I don't want to go home, what about you?" I grab a stone from the ground and throw it in the water. The stone sinks quickly to the ground. The circles he left behind float more and more apart. "I couldn't sleep, so I decided to take a walk. I always come to this place when I can't sleep or just want to be alone." Harry says.

I don't say a word. I feel Harry's eyes burning on my face. "Why did you had a fight with your mom?" Harry asks. I'm glad he says something, it was getting kinda awkward. "She broke down again and I'm done with it. I told her that she should forget about my dad and she needed to stop acting like a child. Then she hit me so I walked away." I feel rage comming up again. "Oh" Is all his says. I nod.

I yawn and shiver. The wind is getting really cold. Harry looks to me. "Do you want to come to my house?" He askes. "No I'm fine." I say. I don't want to go home with him. This could be some kind of act again but deep inside I'm happy he is here. It's not nice here when it's dark. Harry pulls his sweater off and hands it to me.

"Hear put this on, you look really cold and I don't want you to get sick" I smile and look at his bare arms". "Thanks, but aren't you getting cold?" I don't want to feel guilty if he gets sick. He shakes he head. "I'm fine." I smile and put the sweater on. This is much better.

I feel my eyes getting heavier. Harry lays down in the grass again and I follow his lead. I close my eyes and I feel myself falling alseep. Larg arms wrap around my shoulder and gets me closer. I look to Harry. "I'll stay here with you but you have to keep me warm." He smrinks. I laugh and lay my head on his chest. His hands wrap around me again and I smile.

This feels right.

 

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