Hall of 1D fanfic Shit

Zayn

Ahhh I yelled as a group of mean girls pushed me down to the side to get to Zayn malik, I feel someone staring at me and I turned my head to see Zayn malik from 1d staring I caught his eye and looked down and blushed. NO NO NO STOP!!!! IM GOING TO TELL YOUR MOM YOU'RE WRITING A SMUT FANFIC BITCH

These type of fanfics I hate the most..

I have four best friends there names are lilly, Lexi,Helen,Nadia and my name is Zara. We all love one direction so I brought them all tickets and back stage pass to go see them.

Lilly loves Louis

Lexi loves liam

Helen loves harry

Nadia loves Niall

And I love Zayn

When we got backstage all the girls begin talking to there favorite boy and I was talking to Zayn. Zayn looked me in the eye and spoke to me "Zara I known you for only five minutes but it feels like ten please come on tour with me" I begin to nod my head "let me speak to the girls real quick" I called a group meeting

"You will never believe what happened" we said at the same time.

"I'm going on tour with them" we all said again at the same time but this timed we squealed like a bunch of pigs.

"Guys we should probably tell them about our band" Helen said

"You're right" we all said

We then called the boys over.

"Guys we have something to tell you" we said nervously

"Were in a band called two direction" all of sudden the boys wrapped an arm around us "yay" they said "can you sing us a song" Louis said, liam then looked at the ground and to us "what" we answered "I kinda knew y'all were already famous and my favorite song by y'all are big things do y'all mind singing it right now" liam said smiling like a wild man.

"Sure well sing it and are friend Edna Sherman wrote it for us" the boys being to smile widely.

How come the boys never poop are fart in fanfic's what the hell is wrong with your digestive system.

Zayn looked me in the eye and swept me off my feet and took me to our room he unbuttoned my pants and pulled them down he started taking off my underwear he dipped his down and stated skimming my thigh with his nose,-- Whoa Whoa hold up, you haven't taken a shower in the last five chapter and every time you write about going to the bathroom you never wipe, bitch I know he smells the whole damn ocean and fish population on you #Noshadehoney

Its okay when the main character talks about something inappropriate with friends"Guys Zayn dick is so Big I couldn't even fit in his boxer some of his penis was hangin out of it" But nooo don't let a guy do it

I ate my burger and it kinda tasted like Zayns semen "mmmmm" I said aloud "You like" Zayn said from behind me "yes" I replied "I put my special sauce on it" he said smirking I got up from my seat and started screaming ( why are you screaming if that was me I would be crying tears of joy and screaming of glee)