American Sweethearts

26

I was fifteen when it happened. It was a Friday night, and we were on our way home from a family dinner. Quinn was 7 months pregnant, and had just signed the adoption agreement. The pregnancy was unplanned. The result of a one night stand when she was still in the process of discovering her sexuality.

That night, we celebrated our family. My mother had just gotten a new job, I'd been shortlisted for a music prize, and my sister had just come out as gay. For the first time in a long time, we were happy.

I was months away from turning sixteen, and was intent on getting my license as soon as possible. So, I drove us home.

We were just a few minutes away when it happened. It was past 10 pm, and pitch black outside. There were barely any cars around. My dad made a joke about gas prices when I stopped for a red light. My mum laughed, the light turned green, and I took off.

We never made it to the other end of the crossing. A car drove through their red light, slamming into us at full speed. We spun over the road, eventually flipping over and sending me flying through the windshield.

The vehicle erupted in flames, and burnt my mother to ash.

My sister spent three weeks in the hospital. She was bleeding internally, and suffered significant brain trauma. I stayed by her side the whole time.

Once she got out, we sold our house and moved into an apartment for a fresh start. My parent's things are in storage, but I don't plan on seeing them for a long time.

The person who hit us was named Lee Scott, a known criminal with a history of alcohol addiction.

I will never forget that name. I've read it time and time again on all those legal documents, sans heard it during the trial more often than my mother's names.

I survived the accident with only minor injuries. Third-degree burns on my thigh, a handful of cuts on my back, and a concussion. I broke my leg too, but that was an easy fix.

I visit my parent's graves as much as I can. It's been a few weeks now, but it's not easy to visit when I'm so far away, especially considering my avoidance of cars.

Usually, I'd visit them once a week. Quinn or Lena would drive me, or I'd catch the bus. But now, my visit is overdue.

I haven't driven a car since the accident. I'm terrified of getting behind the wheel again. It took me weeks before I'd even set foot into a car again.

Quinn never blamed me for what happened. We would've been hit regardless of who drove, she'd say. But for years, the same thoughts have been repeating in my mind.

What if I waited at that traffic light a little longer? What if we took a different route home? What if I'd sped up a little so our paths wouldn't have crossed? What if we had stopped to get gas like my mother wanted, but the rest of the family refused?

"Why the hell are you playing this song?" Lena asks, pulling my keyboard out of the electrical outlet. My fingers stop playing instantly, but my phone keeps playing the tune.

"I was just... thinking," I say.

"I thought you said you were coping?"

"I am," I nod. "I just miss her."

"You'll see her soon, girl. One more day and we'll be on our way."

I sigh, turning around in my seat. I kick my shoes off. It's time to get changed.

"You're not sad are you?" Lena asks.

"Not really."

I've just been thinking about them non-stop since my argument with Tyler. It hasn't made me sad, but it's made me confused. I feel like a detective, trying to figure out what Tyler could possibly know what I don't.