Dominion

Chapter 19

I have been pacing in front of Leslie's door debating whether my decision is right or not.
Images of the figure keeps flashing in my mind. I have spent the past hour thinking of what might happen if I make this choice and what might happen if I don't. Whatever choice I make, I have either parents there to support me, but do I want to make a choice based on their beliefs?
Pushing away the restraints I have, I take I'm a deep breath and raise my hand to knock on the door.
Before, I am able to knock, the door opens to reveal Leslie.
"Was wondering how much longer you were going to keep pacing in front of my room door."
I open my mouth to speak, surprised, but say nothing.
She sighs and steps aside so I can enter, "Come in."
I step in. Her laptop is open on her bed, it's obvious she is busy. I feel guilty all of a sudden like I am interrupting whatever she was doing to disturb her with my problems.
She closes the door behind me and leans on it, her arms crossed. "Spit it out."
I turn to face her, "I should go. I will come back later, I can see you are busy."
I move towards the door but she blocks it with her body. "I am not. Was just watching a film, which I can continue later." She informs me walking to her bed to pick up her laptop. She puts the laptop on sleep before setting it on her dressing table.
"How did you know I was outside." She sits on her bed and pats the space next to her, I get the hint and sit next to her on the bed.
"I just had the feeling that someone was there so I checked through the peephole and saw you." She explains laying on her back with her hands behind her head.
"And you didn't open the door to ask what I was doing there?"
"No, I knew it's only one thing that could have brought you here and I wanted you to take your time to make your decision, no pressure."
I look down at my fingers intertwined on my lap, "I remember saying in my heart, 'if there is truly a God in heaven, show yourself now.' , when I thought I was going to die in that water and that's when you showed up."
From my side-eye, I see Leslie sit up and I turn to face her with tears brimming in my eyes.
"I can't help but think what if you didn't show up, the story will be different. It's a miracle alone, that I was still breathing when you pulled me out. I thought I was dead, Leslie. I could feel the life being sucked out of me, I could feel my heart giving way to the inevitable end but somehow I was still breathing when you pulled me out. How is that possible, I should be dead! I should be dead!" Leslie pulls me into a hug and I keep ranting 'I should be dead' cause that's the truth, but I am not.
My tears flowing uncontrollably soaking the blue flowery chiffon top Leslie has on.
I pull away from Leslie to cough.
"You shouldn't be dead Clara, stop telling yourself that." Leslie reprimands.
"I know for sure, you coming at that point was God way of saying, 'I truly reign in heaven and I care for you'. The God I have lived all my life believing and proving does not exist. It wasn't mere luck and it struck as so when you said you didn't know what pushed you to check the pool at that point. It was God using you to reach out to me."
I take her by the hand and look deeply into her eyes, "All my life, I have known you, you've never for once condemned me or my family for being atheists. Neither have you directly tried preaching to me about Christ or sitting me down to read the Bible with you. No, you did neither of those but you did preach Christ to me more than words can cover, through your actions. You didn't sit me down to read the Bible with you but you made sure to chip in part of the scriptures in little conversations we had in ways you didn't think I would notice, I know."
I laugh lightly at her surprised  expression, "I happen to have stumbled upon your jotter where you keep note of Bible verses that caught your attention."
"Oh that" She smiles faintly.
"And I happen to have caught you praying more than once for God to change my heart." I add, her eyes widens in shock.
"All those times we spent the holiday together and I picked up a fight with you and you didn't know why, well it was because of that. I guess your prayers has been answered now."
She smiles at me widely, "Do you mean that?"
I nod.
"Oh my God! I am so happy for you." Leslie squels pulling me into a tight hug.
"Okay, what next?" I ask pulling away from the bone crushing hug. I don't get why she is so excited, I just agreed to accept Christ not inform her she won a lottery or something.
Leslie pulls me down as she drops to her knees. I follow suit, kneeling beside her looming over the bed with my palms clasped as hers.
"Repeat after me," Leslie instructs with her eyes closed.
I shut my eyes and wait for her to begin.
"Lord Jesus," She begins.
I go through the prayer with her and by the time we are done, I can't help but feel a burden has been lifted off my shoulders.
"How do you feel?" Leslie asks standing to her feet.
"I don't know, anxious." I shrug.
"Anxious about what?"
I stand to my feet and throw myself on the bed. "About being a christain now, my test results, my life in general."
"About being a christain now, don't worry, baby steps. I am here to help you. Your test results, wanna pray about it?"
"I guess so. That's what  being a Christian entails right? Talking to God about all your problems?"
"That and more." Leslie answers.
"Give me your hand" I sit up to do as she says and close my eyes.
"Lord Jesus, your daughters have come before you again. We ask that the same power that healed the woman with the issue of blood, heal your daughter Clara. Because your word says by your stripes we are healed, we decree and declare that by your stripes she is healed. Let your blood flow from the crown of her head to the sole of her feet and purge her of any sickness and infirmity. We thank you Lord for the grace and privilege to come before you today. Take all the glory and praise, Amen."
"Amen" I say after her.
"Feel better now?"
"Yeah, thanks." I smile genuinely. I can feel the same peace of mind that enveloped me in the oracles room envelope me now.
"What film were you watching?" I ask.
"God's compass. Lucky for you, I was just starting." She picks up her laptop from the dressing table and sets it on the bed, logs in then click on the play button.
"Want a snack to munch on?" Leslie asks half way into the movie.
"Nah, I'm good. What's the time?"
"Lunch time, thank goodness. " Leslie retrieves her ID from under her pillow then puts it on.
I shuffle to my feet then wear my slippers. "Will meet you in the cafeteria." I tell Leslie heading for my room.
"Wait," I turn to look at her.
"Whenever you are afraid or you see the figure, just call the name of Jesus." I nod at her and exit the room.
I am standing in front of my room just staring at the door. I have refused to go in since the incident in the morning opting instead to sit in the garden before going to Leslie's room.
I am glad I didn't, I would just have spent the past hours being paranoid but being in the garden gave me time to think.
"Where have you been?" I nearly jump out of my skin startled. I turn to see it's just Ben.
"You gave me a fright." I smack his arm.
He chuckles lightly, "sorry."
"I was with Leslie." I inform him, opening the door to my room.
"You've converted right?" He asks lowly as if afraid what my answer will be.
I want to look down for I fear my answer will disappoint him but I won't. This is my new life and I should be proud of it to enjoy it to the fullest.
"Yes."
He looks down not saying a word. I reach out to him but he moves out of my grasp.
"It was obvious you would. Were you ever going to tell me?" he looks hurt and it hurts me to know I am the cause but I can't do anything about it. I made my decision fully aware of the consequences and I am not just about to back out.
"I was, it was just now. I watched a film with Leslie afterwards and now it's lunch-time. I didn't even get to finish the film with Leslie, I was definitely going to tell you probably during lunch or some other time when time permits." I explain.
"I am referring to the fact that you weren't going to let me know your decision before acting on it."
"I didn't see the need to tell you, sorry." I apologize to him. I don't ven see the big deal in all of this, he is overreacting.
"Didn't see the need to tell me!?" he spits angrily.
"You know, this is the reason why I saw the need to come with you for this 'search to find the truth'" he finger quotes my words.
"I feared you were going to be brainwashed by this whole Christian thing and I was right. So what, if Jesus died on the cross and resurrected again, he doesn't validate that he is Lord or whatever they call him and it doesn't validate for a fact that there is God."
I close my eyes and take in deep breaths trying to control my emotions.
"Ben stop talking." I mutter under my breath but still loud enough for him to hear me.
"No, I won't. You need to listen to me, I don't care whatever they made you believe but you need to hear me and hear me well.
"Ben stop talking, please." I raise my voice this time over his ranting.
"Tell me why? Why huh?" he grabs me by the shoulder and begins to shake me vigorously, " is it because you don't want to hear the truth? Wake up Clara and listen to me, there is no God! There is no God!"
Tears are brimming in my eyes, "Ben let me go, you're hurting me." I plead repeatedly trying to free myself from his grasp but his grip is tight.
He doesn't heed to my pleas but keeps shouting "There is no God!"
I loose it and lift my arms with every strength I can muster to strike him on his face. Instantly, his grip loosens and he steps back in shock.
"Shut up! Shut up Ben!" I scream, tears flowing from my eyes.
Ben stands still, shock written all over his face. His eyes holds a mix of emotions pain, sadness, shock and most of all, anger .
"You slapped me." he says in disbelief raising his hand to his right cheek where my palm landed.
"I am sorry, I didn't mean to" I lean on the wall running my fingers through my hair.
"No, I definitely think you meant to." he retort pointing a finger at me.
I push away from the wall and take a step closer to him, he doesn't step back. "Look, I am sorry okay? I snapped but you need to understand something, you are wrong. I should have died today, you should be on your way now carrying my corpse back home but you are not and I am still alive because God saved me. I wasn't even a Christian and he saved me."
"No, you are alive cause Leslie got to you on time and pulled you out." he argues.
"No Ben! No!" I snap, "I know what I faced inside that water you don't. I prayed, I didn't know what I was doing but I said in my heart, if there is a God in heaven show yourself and he did through Leslie. Do you think it's some kind of coincidence that Leslie came at the point I was about to breathe my last breath?"
"Yes and I do believe all these story about some figure or creature attacking you is a farce."
"What?" I blurt out in disbelief.
"Yes, a figment of your imagination. You want to know what really happened? You were seeing things and began to panic which resulted to your near-drowning then Leslie came at the right time, found you and pulled you out. That's what happened, so you might want to get the loose screws in your head screwed."
I refuse to look at him for fear I might see the reason in his point just as I am already. I want to say something to prove he us wrong but nothing is coming to my head.
He turns me by my chin to face him, "drop this nonsense, you know what I am saying is the truth. Why are you being stubborn?" his voice is soft and pleading.
Since I don't respond he continues, "I know you are going through a rough time, let me help you get back to your feet. Nothing good can come out of this, trust me. I have been there before."
My eyes widens at his confession, I never knew anything about him being a Christian before. When was this? I have known him since kindergarten and I have known him to be an atheist ever since. It was one of the reasons we grew close. Could it just be a lie to lure me back, cause it's working.
"Trust me, I have. It's a long story for another day." he says sensing my doubt.
"I want to know the story. When was this? Why didn't you tell me?" A lot of questions regards his confession runs through my mind.
"I will tell you but not today. Come on, let's go eat lunch." I nod in agreement.
"Just a second, let me get my ID." I excuse myself raising a finger at him.
I am about to enter my room when I remember I haven't showered since morning.
I turn around to face him sheepishly. "I forgot, I need to shower and brush too."
I can't imagine I have been going around with my morning breath, we'll I didn't catch anyone scrunching their nose when I talked. Thank God I didn't miss my night brushing last night else, I can't imagine how bad my breath will be.
"No problem, I will be in my room waiting." he says.
"Thanks for getting yourself back." he adds patting me on the shoulder before leaving for his room.
I don't say anything to that, just manage to put on a smile. Does this mean I have dropped the Christain faith as quickly as I picked it? Is this what I really want? I am not sure I know what I believe in anymore.
I shake my head in an attempt to clear my thoughts and enter my room. Discarding my small night gown I have been in all day, I step into the bathroom to have a quick shower.
I brush my teeth first, and as I do so whilst looking in the mirror I can't help but remember how I had seen the figure standing right behind me in this same mirror, this morning.
I shake my head and rinse my mouth, 'just your imagination' I tell myself.
I have a quick shower all the while reflecting on all that transpired in the Oracle room, my conversation with Leslie and all Ben said.
Feeling my thoughts overwhelming me, I step out of the shower, grabbing my towel to dry my body with.
Subconsciously, I feel my hand roam around the area where I was jabbed in the stomach as I towel myself. I walk to the front of the mirror to get a better look at it, the scar is there ugly in it's true form.
Standing in front of the mirror, looking at the scar, I have a conviction. This is not possible through a figment of my imagination and in as much as this scar is real, God is real.