a poem.
i will never
ever
be satisfied with what i have.
whether it be my looks,
or my voice,
or the way i tap my pen
i will never be satisfied.
every
single
little thing about myself,
i can't stand.
i don't have a
single
good quality
to my name.
i'm overly sensitive.
it's embarrassing.
i cry when i hear someone sing because
i know
i lack the confidence to even try.
i cry when i see someone trying on clothes because i always
cry when i go shopping.
i believe that i am worthless and disgusting.
adults say i'm just like every other teenage girl
and i'll get over it.
but
the heavy clouds that fill my head never leave
and i'm still crying over stupid shit at two am.
but at twelve pm i'm telling you to love yourself
and preaching about how everybody's beautiful
in their own way.
but don't you dare try to tell me that i'm beautiful too
because i will deny
and deny
and deny
until there's nothing left to do but shut you out
and let those heavy clouds weigh me down,
back down into my bed of self-pity.
where i find myself most nights
writing shitty poetry about how insecure i am
with everything
me.
