A Collapsing Star

Chapter Six

Tony was hiding.

Okay, so when he thought about it like that it made Tony sound like he was a coward. He wasn't. (and he wasn't and anyone who said otherwise could fuck off) He was merely attempting to avoid a problem before it began.

Ever since the rogues moved back in, Tony had been on edge. When he found out his son was a web-slinging vigilante he took five steps closer. And when he got kidnapped Tony took another three. And when everything was fixed and the relationship between the rogues and his family was getting better (not quite fixed, but getting there) Tony was able to move back a little while.

Then Steve asked Tony to let Bucky stay and Tony just dived down the deep end.

So yeah, maybe he was a coward. But it was better in the long run.

Tony (and FRIDAY, Rhodey and his incredible therapist Eliza) had worked out the real reason as to why he didn't like being around Barnes. The logical answer would be that Bucky killed his parents.

("Did he really though?" Eliza asked, peering at him through her thick glasses.

"Yes! I saw the video! With my own eyes!"

Eliza hummed. "And Clint? When he was under mind control, he killed a lot of people. Are you holding that against him?"

Tony glared. "That's not fair."

"I'm your therapist. I don't do fair.")

So maybe--just maybe--it wasn't Bucky fault. He was under Hydra's control and had no idea what he was doing. And as much as Tony wanted to punch him in the face and accuse him and blame him for his parent's death, he knew it wasn't fair.

So Tony wasn't angry with Barnes because of his parent's death.

The second answer was that Barnes ruined his marriage. If he hadn't had an affair with Steve, they might still be married and Peter would've grown up with both of his dads.

("Did Steve tell you that he was still in love with Bucky when you got married?"

Tony sighed, looking down at his hands. "Yes. He said that if he knew Bucky was alive..."

"Does that sound like a healthy and successful marriage?" Eliza asked. "Do you think that a marriage based off a rebound--" Tony had flinched lightly at the term but he didn't deny it. "--could last longer than a few years?"

Tony shook his head silently.

"Sounds to me like your marriage to Steve was falling apart to begin with.")

Okay. Yeah. That actually does make a lot of sense. The truth of the matter is simple: Tony and Steve got married while Steve was in love with another person. (What a cliche) And as much as Tony had tried to tell himself that it wasn't, that marriage was doomed to fail.

So no, it wasn't because Bucky and Steve had an affair (although, Tony still deems he's allowed to be bitter about that because, come on! That was a dick move, true love or not)

And honestly, those were the only two reasons Tony could come up with that he had some arguments for. And after Eliza had given him the Bitch Slap of Truth, Tony found himself struggling to find other reasons.

But in the end he found none.

Tony didn't really have any reasons to hate Barnes.

But that was scary. Because if he had nothing to hate about him, then that meant he had to be civil to him. That meant that Tony wasn't allowed to be overly malicious or rude, which meant all of his usual coping mechanisms were useless to him now.