Have you ever wondered "who am I?" or "What am I doing here?" I think that every day. I lay in my bed, not making a sound. I'm not moving, but stream-like tears fall down my face. Even though I'm here... I'm not HERE. I think about everything that's wrong with me. Then it happens, I can't breathe. Before I can scream, I'm out.
When I open my eyes, my room is pitch black. I check my phone. It's 12:00 am.
"New record" I say aloud. I have never had one of those for 4 hours.
I grab my computer and watch Taylor Reilly. She may not be my favorite YouTuber, but she has a special place in my heart.
This may be a good time to introduce myself. Hi... I'm Nicole. I'm 16. I suffer from depression and anxiety, all clinical. Life is "great for me", pErfECt.
A couple hours go by and I hear my mom yelling my name from downstairs.
"I'm about to shower!" I yell to my mom. I slowly stand up, about to got to the bathroom. I look at my eyes, they look TOO red. I strip my clothes off and turn my Khalid playlist on. His music always makes me feel better. I step into the shower and wash every inch of my body. I step out, feeling more calm and serene. I wrap the towel around my body and go out of the bathroom. I sit down on the bed. I decide to text my bestie, Rosé
R O S É 🥰🌹
Me: Good Morning hoe!
Rosé 🥰🌹: Good Morning Baby!
My heart beats faster "ok, it's just a nickname, right? Oof, I over analyze things too much"
Me: Are you ready?
Rosé: for hell? Haha you really thought...
Me: I'm not ready either, I'll be at our school meetup in 30?
Rosé : ok! See you there!
I put my phone down and walk to my closet, I take out a really big Billie Ellish hoodie. I put on a white cropped top and black ripped shorts. After I put on the hoodie, the shorts are no longer visible. I put on high-top black converse. I grab my backpack and walk downstairs.
I see my mom in her doctor scrubs "hey, mommy!" I come behind her and give her a hug.
"Hello my child" she says back.
"What's for breakfast?" I sit down at the table
She throws a granola bar at me "Granola bars, I have a surgery this morning so we need to leave now"
"Ok.." I jump out of my seat and head towards the car
We get into the car and I play BTS music. My dad was korean, Ahh... I miss him.
Ok so um.... that's the end of chapter one. When I was writing this on paper it LOOKED longer but um... it's not. I will try to make them longer after the couple I already wrote.
BYEEEE~
YOU ARE READING
My messed up, weird, confusing love story
Ficção AdolescenteThis is about a girl, not just any girl, a depressed and anxious girl. I'm not giving any other spoilers~ It might seem weird at first, but I promise it will get better! (Maybe)
