Medicate

Breakfast

"Are you going to your program today?"

Emily opened her eyes to see Nick standing over her, his shirt open and his belt unbuckled. "Mmm, good morning to me." She hummed lazily at him. She was not a morning person and never had been, but morning sex was something else. It was second only to angry sex.

"Very funny, Em. Are you going today?"

Emily sat up took one hand and grabbed both ends of his belt and pulled him to her. "Maybe we can be late this morning." She tucked her hands in his waistband and looked up at him. "What do you say?" She inched him closer so her mouth was right in front of his zipper.

Nick hesitated. She looked so good in her little lavender nightgown, her nipples making hard little tents against the fabric. And she was never as enthusiastic in the evenings as she was during morning sex. He knew he had to refuse this morning, though. He had a meeting and he was already running late. "Babe, I would love to, but there's no time today. I have a meeting. You should start getting dressed though. We're running late." He started buttoning his shirt, cursing himself for scheduling a meeting at the beginning of the day when he could be screwing his wife.

"Am I invited to the meeting? I can hide under the table and make it a great morning for you." She raised her eyebrows at him.

"Hon, I would legitimately kill for that but I think I would get fired. Please start getting ready though." He hated having to wake her up in the mornings. All doctors said that getting enough sleep was essential for good mental health and she'd stayed up too late the night before. In total she'd probably only gotten five hours of sleep.

"I don't think I want to go today, babe. I'm really tired."

That's what he was afraid of. He stopped fixing his clothes to look at his wife. "I think after last night you probably should go, honey," he said softly. "You should talk about what happened with somebody."

Emily looked down. She could never look him in the eye when they talked about this kind of stuff. It made her feel like a child that he had to care for and she hated it. She was his wife. She was supposed to be his equal and instead she couldn't even go to work anymore. "Probably."

Nick gave her a small smile. "Come on. I'll drive you."

"I can drive myself. I'm not running late."

"I can drive; I'm not running that late. I made sure to add in time for you."

Emily smiled politely. "Thank you." Nick smiled back and went downstairs. She knew he wasn't actually driving her because he was nice. He was driving her because it kept him sure that she went to her program and stayed there because she wouldn't have a ride back. She obviously knew that she could always Uber home if she really wanted to, but she didn't want to disappoint him. She knew he hated when she was home alone and she understood why. He didn't have to say it because she could read it on him like a book on the days she wouldn't go.

Some days she didn't want to go because she couldn't find the motivation to drag herself out of bed. Those days were a little more comforting for him because he figured that meant that she wouldn't have the motivation to hurt herself too badly. She usually didn't want to go though because she hated it. She hated spending three days a week doing group therapy and listening to people whine. So many of the people in the room were stuck in their own toxic ruts and she felt bad for them because she understood they were sick too, but she was so tired of fucking hearing about it. It put an unnecessary weight on her shoulders and felt like it was pulling her down. It was only a four hour program, but it was four hours too long.