A Life Without Me?

chapter 3

"im sorry matt, I keep stopping." you tell him. "oh baby, take your time." he says to you kiss your forehead again. the nurse walks in checking on you. "hi, are you okay? you have a half hour with him then I have to make him go in the waiting room while you nap." the nurse says to you in the kindest, almost fake sounding, voice. "okay" You say to her but you really don't want him to leave you. she leaves the room quickly. "continue baby?" Matt says, almost sounds like he was asking a question. "okay.. um. well he invited me in his house and i willingly went in thinking he was just going to sit on the couch and eat the pies with me. well he locked the door behind him when we went in... I turned around and asked him to unlock them... but um.. he grabbed my arms and pushed my in a room with no windows. I was screaming and pleading for him to let me go.... but um Matt, he wouldn't let me go. he slapped me over and over until I would stop screaming...." matts eyes widened and he started hugging you as hard as he could and you could barley breath. "he tided my hand Matt. he wouldn't let me go. he cut off my clothes and he raped me. he hurt me Matt. he did things to me I never want to experience again. i am scared to have sex. i don't want to. he hurt me. he punched me in the face when I refused. Matt, I'm so scared. what if he comes back. what if he gets me again. he could kill me. he told me not to tell anyone and that it was our secret.." He kissed you and put both hands on your cheeks. "Baby, I never knew. you should've told me. I could've helped.." Matt pleads. you look at him and say "My emotions are numb, I need to harm myself to feels again. oh baby, I just wanna feel again. I just wanna love myself. but I can't." Matt looks at you and cries... he pulls up his sleeves and shows you his scars. "baby I know the pain... i can help you."