El sol y la luna - Camren (english Version)

Chapter 26

Lauren's POV

We arrived at the high school, where the dance would take place. Is this our last dance together? I don't doubt the fact that our separation would make me a different person but it was something that had to happen.

Before getting out of the car, I noticed Camila tense and looked down for a few seconds until she saw me in the eyes, sighed and smiled as if nothing happened

"Camz?" I asked

"Yes, Laur?" her voice had everything off, broken as if trying not to cry

"Can you tell me what's happening,my love?" I tried to sound as calm as possible not to disturb her anymore but it didn't work at all

"I don't want that this is, our last night, Lauren. I don't want to wake up tomorrow and realize that you are far away, I can't even imagine what it will be like tomorrow, what it will be next week, what will be next year. I don't want to imagine life without you. It hurts me like something has never hurt me. I can't get out of my mind the fact that you will find someone better and will make you happy and I will just be a memory, one more fucking memory it's not fine..." she said and stopped talking.

That's when I felt my heart much more broken than before, I felt helpless to not be able to do anything, I saw how I fought not to cry and not ruin makeup. I didn't know what to say.

"Now, let's go there and enjoy this shit" she said and got out of the car and I hurried to catch up with her, turn her over and kiss her, it was a chaste kiss, one that I know we both needed more than ever.

There was no need to deepen, none wanted that, we just needed a bit of strength, one that would only provide the lips of the other...

"Forgive me, Camzi.." I managed to say after a few minutes "I, fuck I..alone.. I mean, shit, it's not something you want, but I know it will be better for you, baby. Soon you will understand, it will be the best love, just enjoy today. Okay?"

She just nodded, kissed my lips once more and we entered the gym. We met the girls and their respective partners, Ally had gone with Troy (Ally wasn't even old enough to be at a dance but she always followed us) Normani with Arin and finally Dinah with Siope.

We sat at the same table as them and we talked about the universities that Camila and Dinah would go to, apparently they had agreed and they would go to Orlando with Normani, they would buy an apartment and they would be together.

Camila would study Literature, Dinah theater and Normani dance.

For my part, I told them that I would continue studying photography but at another university. They didn't know yet, not even Camila, I turned to see her had the look down and just smiled sadly before sighing and turning to me and kiss me.

Fuck I had never done anything so hard.
I knew it hurt but I couldn't do anything.

It was for her good. And as if the world could against me, began to sound scientist, Camila pulled me and we started dancing that damn song.

I was a masochist. Yes, I was and I love her for being a masochist too. I love her for laughing, for smiling, for being so sweet, for being such a good person, for having the greatest heart in the world, for having made me so happy.

I love her for the little things, I love her for her flaws that made her perfect in my eyes, for her moles, for supporting me, for taking care of me, for protecting me whenever I could, I love her for being herself and not pretending to change.

I love her for supporting me even in bad times like these, and above all, I love her for teach me how to love.

That song finished and the next one which followed was Photograph.

There is no doubt that life hates me, Camila was hugging my neck while my arms were around her waist and whispered the song in my ear.

"Loving can hurt

Loving can hurt sometimes

But it's the only thing that I know

When it gets hard

You know it can get hard sometimes

It is the only thing that makes us feel alive

We keep this love in a photograph

We made these memories for ourselves

Where our eyes are never closing

Hearts are never broken

Times forever frozen still"

The night passed faster than I would have liked. Camila asked me if we could stay until there was nobody, I didn't refuse.

I couldn't deny her anything now.

And so, as the hours passed, the place was getting emptier until finally the gym was alone, with Camila and me facing each other.

I didn't want him to leave.

I didn't want to wake up tomorrow without her. I saw that she wrote something on her cell phone and then she kept it.

"I suppose that's all" she said and a tear ran down my cheek

"I guess so.." I said

And we cried, we cried because we needed it and we cried because we loved each other.

"Do you remember that that's where I defended the Mojon?" I asked pointing to the place where I once defended her from Austin, where he embraces her for the first time, she smiled and nodded without ceasing to cry.

"Camzi, it's for the best.." I said and she exploded

"Stop deciding for me Lauren! I am old enough to know what is best for me and what is not! You are the best! But are you determined to get me out of your life, is it the best thing for me or for you, Lauren?" she asked "you know that if you're with me being and having other women you will feel bad, but without me you won't care, what do you really want?"

"You're doing me a favor? or doing yourself a favor? don't you understand that my world is absolutely shit without you? I love you Lauren, and you're only hurting me further away from you...."she said and I was shocked, tears were coming down my cheek.

She started to walk towards the exit. And I reacted.

"Camila? You can't go walking, it's too late, let me at least take you" really Lauren? After everything she had told me I just answered that, I'm a shitty person..

"Diego is waiting for me outside" she answered me and I felt like the blood boiled me, he was a good guy but she  Camila was mine I reached her and took her arm

"Let me go, Lauren, don't make it harder..." she said

"Don't go with him , please. You are mine." I said with a thread in m voice

"You are giving up Lauren! Leave me alone, don't make it harder than it already is.." and a tear fell down her cheek

I hurried to kiss her in an aggressive, rough way, without care, I felt that she pushed me and I lowered my gaze.

"No Lauren, I can't anymore, not like this" Camila said, with tears in her eyes,
"this shit hurts like a motherfucker"

"I love you, baby" I just said those 3 words as I watched the love of my life go out that door, dying to run hug her but I knew it wasn't the right time.

Not now. Not after that..

And this was our damn end.

And I was alone ...