Unfinished Files.

Who am I?

Five years ago.

"Ethan Wilmer! Pay attention when I'm talking to you?" Mr. Smith snaps from across the room but, his voice is muffled like he's talking through water. I shake my head to try and get the feeling to go away. I hear footsteps echo as they get closer to me. "Mr. Wilmer do you need to excuse yourself for a moment?" His voice thunders in my head.

I stand on unsteady legs and stumble out into the hall. I lean against the nearest set of lockers and slide down until I'm sitting on the floor. I stare blankly straight ahead as my vision blurs. I sit for a few minutes until all the signs vanish; the hearing distortion, the shaky legs and, the blurry vision. I go back in the classroom and retake my seat to continue with class.

Present.

I flip through channels looking for a football or baseball game to watch. I find a college soccer game and set the remote down on the coffee table. When it gets to a commercial I get up and walk into the kitchen. I get a tall glass from the polished oak cabinet and go over to the fridge to get some ice and water. I take the water and go back into the living room to return to the game. I watch the game closely, rooting for neither team but acknowledging when either make a good play.

When the game is over I go into the kitchen to make some dinner. I look in the fridge and find the chicken breast I bought along with some barbecue. I get out the cutting board and a knife and begin to open the packaging of the chicken when a uncomfortable feeling comes over me.

I wake up in a panic. Where am I? How did I get here? I sit up and look around the room. I begin to slow my breathing when I recognize the room as my bedroom. I look over at the clock next to my bed; 7:31. I hold my head in my hands trying to remember what happened after I watched the game yesterday. After a few minutes of no luck, I give up and get up to get ready for the day.

I go into the bathroom and look in the mirror, I rub the dark bags that are permanently plagued my face since I was a teen.

I am now 22 and have a job at a local coffee shop and pizza place even though I don't enjoy the pizza place that much and it makes my anxious at times. I quickly take a shower and put on my shirt for the coffee shop with khaki shorts. I comb my hair with just a touch of gel. I give myself one final glance in the mirror before leaving the bathroom and going to find socks and shoes.

I find my sneakers in the kitchen by the table. In the sink is the pan, cup, plate, and silverware from dinner. Oh yeah, I was making chicken last night. I guess I was just so tired that I forgot.

I put on my shoes and check to make sure I have my wallet, phone, and keys. I step outside and pull the apartment door closed and make sure to lock it. I wake down the hallway and down the stairs to the sidewalk. The coffee shop is only a few blocks away and I don't mind the walk. It gives me a chance to think about the day ahead and get some fresh air. But on this morning I can't help but think about last night and not remembering making dinner or getting ready for bed.

Once I get to the coffee shop I'm forced to push it out of my mind and store it with my belongings in my locker. I clock in and wash my hands in the back as I hear James, one of my coworkers, greet the first customers of the day. After drying my hands, I go to join him and start making some mornings brighter, one cup of coffee at a time.

After my shift ends at 1, I make myself a large caramel macchiato and rush out to make it home in time to change to make it to the coffee shop on time.

In the next couple weeks, I seem to black out more often and don't remember what I did. These episodes are especially scary when I'm not home and I don't know where I've gone or what I did. I've decided seem professional help and see my doctor.

Two weeks later.

I wait impatiently in the waiting room. As the weird feeling returns, right as I hear the door open and someone call my name my head gets heavy and hangs down.