niichans storytime

[REDACTED]

once upon a time, a [REDACTED] lived by [REDACTED] lonesome in a village. [REDACTED] was loved by all, and yet, there was some force that stopped [REDACTED] from advancing in life.

a dream came to [REDACTED] one night.. or perhaps more accurately, an omen. god himself spoke to [REDACTED]. "sorry i thought it would be funny to make your soulmate a dumbass"

before [REDACTED] could respond, he left. "what the fuck i'm going to fucking projectile vomit on god" [REDACTED] thought. the next morning, a girl came knocking on her door.

"good day," said the village [REDACTED]. "g'orning," said the new girl.

what the fuck does this mean.. what the fuck.. wait, the village [REDACTED]'s thoughts are spreading to the audience! actually.. they're all thinking the same thing?

if you had tuned in last time, the new girl was actually the bacteria girl! and this is obvious by the fact that she stumbled 3 times trying to walk through a door.

somehow, the bacteria girl stumbled and fell on top of the village [REDACTED]. now this, folks, is what we call REAL romance. straight from a wattpad source.

"you're stupid. you're so fucking stupid i'm going ti punch you" said the village [REDACTED]. "haha and then what? ;)" replied the bacteria girl. "HOW THE FUCK DID YOU SAY THAT OUT LOUD"

..is what the bacteria girl said. the village [REDACTED] however, fucking passed out due to iron deficiency.

i'm running out of ideas AGAIN umm the village [REDACTED] saw the bacteria girl on one knee, holding out a ring pop. "sorry if this is creepy i didn't know when you'd wake up so i've been like this for hours"

"just fucking marry me already" said the village [REDACTED]. then they killed god. and lived happily ever after.