oneshot / j. valeska

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You are with the Maniax in Galavan's mansion

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You are with the Maniax in Galavan's mansion. Greenwood tries to make a move on you, but Jerome decides to put things in place.

It feels cliche.
1292 words

Being at Galavan's mansion meant a multitude of things.
First, you were basically Barbara Kean's confidant. She would tell you about things she did with Tabitha Galavan that you never wanted to know, or simply talk about boys with you, which you were fine with.

Second, everyone talked about the reason you were in Arkham Asylum. While Greenwood was in for cannibalism, Jerome and Barbara in for matricide, you were in Arkham for killing your therapist and chopping him up into little bits.

And third, you were one of three girls in said mansion. So there was an inordinate amount of flirting.

Especially with Greenwood. He would say things to you that would make bile pile up in your throat, things like, "I can't wait to eat you up tonight, baby~" or, "I bet you'd taste so good if you were a little bloody and screaming."
No one, not even Tabitha Galavan, you bet, could put up with that horrendous flirting. But before you could come to Theodore with this problem, since it had been going on for countless weeks, Jerome Valeska, the king of the Maniax, decided to step in, much to your surprise.

"Greenwood," the redhead growled, making the stumpier murderer spin around slowly. "What are you doing?" His voice was obviously a bit deeper, something Jerome often did when he was in a mood.

Robert smirked. (Yes, his name is Robert ) "I'm just talkin' to our colleague," he said quite bluntly, "Hey whattsa matter, your highness? Jelly?" You knew that Jerome's and Greenwood's egos were huge, and since they'd already had a large fight about who was the leader of the Maniax, Robert was always a little fussy around Jerome. So, that made tensions rise. Especially around you.

"Greenwood," You said in an increasingly annoyed tone, trying to get them to listen to you. And it worked, for the most part. "Please leave me alone." That made Jerome's smirk fluctuate quickly. And Robert's deflate even quicker.

"Awe, c'mon, we were just jokin' around!" The frizzy haired cannibal protested, yanking at your arm. "Weren't we?"

Theodore Galavan, much to your dismay, walked in the room just then. He raised his eyebrows at the dilemma, and took you by the arm. "Well, well, well, what do we have here? A little love triangle?" He was always so nosy, and never knew when to back out of other people's business. So, it was no wonder Penguin wanted his head. And Jim Gordon, too.

"If you two like her so much, then you should prove your worth!" Theo proposed, and your bad mood dropped to an even worse mood, if possible. "I propose a gauntlet. To prove that you are worthy of the fair lady's love." He took your hand and kissed it, which you dreadfully took back and wiped the back of your hand on your pants.

Jerome's eyebrows raised with curiosity. "Y'know, you're making it sound an awful like she's a fair maiden. And you know, fair maidens marry kings." He said, trying to lean in closer to you. Now, as much as you liked Jerome, and you did, you wanted to let these three know that it was a blank slate. You backed up from Jerome, your back hitting the windowsill. You hadn't fallen, but a simple slip would send you tumbling stories to the ground in mere seconds.

Jerome chuckled, a low hollow hum from his throat that made your heart quiver. "Be careful, princess. If you slip, you might need someone to catch you."

People seemed to play these maniacs out a lot more crazier than they were. Now, as deranged and sick as Jerome and Robert were, there was a method to this madness. You were supposedly the smartest planner in all the Maniax, taking extra steps to ensure everyone's safety and that the GCPD wouldn't get in your way. So, this included a getaway vehicle for you and Jerome and Robert, save for a few Maniax. You were going to tempt the GCPD with a bus full of students; cheerleaders and football players. Jerome was going to spray them down with gasoline and light it up. You were going to do some talking. Surprisingly, Galavan wanted you two to be the poster children of the Maniax. The papers had already dubbed you the crazy king and queen of Gotham. Which neither of you complained about.

You were supposed to sit in the back of the bus, with a lighter in hand. It was a stunt, you'd silently choke out one of the bigger cheerleaders and throw on her outfit, so it was pretty snug but a little loose. Jerome was going to come on the bus and rattle everyone's bones, pick you up, and then make a romantic scene out of it. This was Galavan's plan, in place of the gauntlet.

As much as you were a sucker for Jerome, you hated romantic scenes. So you opted out. You were not a weak little cheerleader waiting to be rescued by a crazy redhead prince charming. You were smart, you were fast, and you were a damn good killer.

You waited in the back of the gasoline tank, next to Richard Sionis. You were wearing a outfit that resembled both the Arkham Asylum inmate uniforms and a straightjacket, and you bet you looked pretty fashionable. You and Jerome had worked out a solution for you not being a damsel in distress.

As the police cars pulled up, and Jim Gordon howled for nobody to shoot, you knew your time was coming. You grabbed the lighter and lit a cigarette, blowing smile out of your nostrils. "Hello, boys." You cackled, waving with your other hand to seem as deranged as possible. You idled next to Jerome, and he slid a hand comfortably around your waist. "Enjoy the fireworks, cop-Os!" You shrieked, throwing the cancer stick onto the pool of gasoline on the ground. As the flames lit around the bus, Jerome turned to you and grabbed your chin with a few fingers.

"You're my Queen of Gotham, got that?" He asked in that low, husky voice of his.
You smiled widely, feeling hot breath on your cheeks. You didn't really want to answer, to make it cliche, and connected your lips. Jerome's lips were soft and sweet, they tasted like strawberries. Did he use chapstick?

No, seriously. Did Jerome Valeska actually put on chapstick in hopes that you two would kiss?

The strawberry mixed with cigarette smoke made a woozy taste in your mouth, one you wanted to taste forever. Jerome pushed you back, and you understood why. "Let's go, babe." He grabbed your hand and you two jumped onto the side of the large vehicle, and before you knew it, you were speeding down Gotham, and Jerome was banging on the side of the tank with a gas pumper.

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