You're an Asshole | Changlix ✓

-Lee Felix On His New Routine-

'Felix stared at the empty seat across from him, tapping his pencil against the closed Korean book. Lips slightly parted he began to count the tedious, silent ticks from the clock. One, two, three, and Felix took a breath, whipping towards the door when he heard it open. It was just the library part-timer, waving to Felix when the blonde didn't look away.

With a soft sigh, he shakes his head, opening his book and deciding to work on the lesson himself.

It's already been a week, Changbin having blocked his number even after many pitiful attempts to contact him. Felix stays over at Woojin's place now that the older moved to a bigger apartment, sleeping in a guest room Woojin specifically got for him as Felix contacted him the first time, only refusing as he was about to move in a month or two and would just be an inconvenience to Felix.

Now as roommates, the two got along well, especially when Felix locks himself in the room and just draws for hours on end, no contact, no food. Only bathroom breaks and small sips of water.

Maybe this was a way to get over his recent break-up, that maybe drawing and focusing on school will ease him through it. Until he graduates and moves from Seoul. But it wasn't fair on his friends. While Changbin had stopped hanging out with them except for Jisung (for the better anyway, as it would just be tense with them in the same room) Felix still attempts to act normal, however, avoiding Changbin and dodging questions. Thanks to the help of Woojin, the group dropped the subject.

All Felix had to do now was to wait until he had to get over a stupid crush! He knew he shouldn't have chased after his desire to be with Changbin. He should've gone with his gut instinct instead of following his dumb heart!

Maybe this was what his mother was trying to protect him from. Lying all those years, taunting Felix as in reality, it was to hide the fact the cold truth. Because it was easier getting angry than being sad.

A person can't be angry forever, but sadness is hard to dispose of. It beats you up, taunts, spits and deprives you until you're nothing but a pulp. Felix understood that his mother was trying to protect him from the truth, afraid to lose a son with a chance that he never recovers. Kind of like Felix with Changbin.

Felix had hidden the truth from Changbin, in fear he'll lose him forever when all he needed to was to trust in the older. That was all, and Changbin would've forgiven him like that.

Maybe that was why he was still angry at his mother, because deep down he realized that his mother didn't trust him enough to act mature and accept her death when the time came.

He really was an idiot. He said Changbin could be the beginning of love, however, he's done nothing but lie to the older. Felix has said he trusts the older, yet why didn't he tell the truth? He's said he would tell Changbin if anything was wrong, as the older really wanted Felix to be happy. Yet Felix thought he was mature enough to handle it on his own, not needing anybody to help him get up.

But he was an idiot! A dumb fucking idiot foolishly in love, and thinking to protect the other, only ended up hurting him.

Felix wipes at his eyes with his sleeve, sniffing and huffing out a shaky breath.

Stupid fucking Lee Felix. He's read many romance books, watched many romcoms, yet know shit about love.

"Yo, that book depressing?" Someone points at the book in Felix's hands, the Australian perking up with wide eyes, before nodding and wiping at his nose.

"Yeah, yeah it's really sad." Felix stutters. 

---

"Felix!" Woojin knocks on Felix's door, the younger not bothering to look up from his laptop and drawing tablet, focusing on a game design someone paid him to draw. When the other didn't answer, there was another knock, only this time, Chan entered, Felix shooting up with wide eyes.