Bang! Bang! Bang!
Craig was awoken by the noise of hard knocking on the door. It was the middle of the night, so he didn't give a fück who it was, they better be selling candy or else he's sending them to the grave. He scrunched up his nose and groggily got out of bed in his work clothes. The poor man was uncomfortable. He made his way downstairs. As he was about to turn on the lights, Kenny's hand smacked Craig's away, "Shhh." The blond whispered "Its the cops."
Craig glared at the slightly shorter figure with unease "You fücking cunt sucker." Craig then opened the door, making Kenny lunge to the shadows. Craig squinted his eyes as the cops shined their bright flashlights in Craig's bïtchy face. "Sir, this is the address to Kenny McCormick's residence, is it not?" One of the police officers questioned. Craig groaned "Sí, por favor toma la puta, te lo ruego."
The cops stood silent for abit, "E-Excuse me? Speako engrish?" One of the cops tried to get through the language barrier. "Soy muy gay." Craig stated. "....yeah, um, sorry to disturb your um... sleepo.. mr.. uhh" the same cop spoke. "Stevey Sanchez-Corilas-Martinez-Rodriguez-VonJulio-Sequceas-Solidad." Craig cleared his throat. The cop just stood silent, "Alright you guys, let's go back to the station." They all retreated back to their car, except one cop. The cop smirked "Oh so you speak Taco Taco now, Craig?" The cop snickered. "Wha-- Goddamnit Clyde, get your gay ass outta here. And its Peruvian, dumbass. " Craig shoved Clyde the cop away from the front door and slammed it shut.
Craig's eyes averted to a corner were he could sense a horny little man in the shadow. He walked up to Kenny and grabbed him by his hair and dragged him upstairs, "Get your fücking ass to bed before I beat the shït outta you."
"Sorry Craigslist, but I don't speak Taco Ta--" before Kenny could finish his comeback, Craig throws Kenny in his room and goes to his own.
"I LOVE YOU, CRAIGGY~~"
"SHUT UP, YOU HÖE."
"AWW, NOOO~ I LOVE YOU MORE~"
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𝐀 𝐇𝐨𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐀 𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞 ||🥀
Fanfiction;'title A Hoe For A Roommate Craig is stuck with a whore for a roommate. It sucks åss to be honest, Craig would sometimes hear female møaning from his roommate's room since the walls were extremely thin. This ruined sëx for Craig, and...
