Born to be Different

Chapter 1: Sheltered

Kim Namjoon

After school ended I headed straight for my room and slammed the door shut.

I can't believe that I let it happen again. I panicked I didn't know what to do. God I'm so angry with myself. I promised everyone that I'd control it.

I hear footsteps running to my room, probably my brother's. I bet he's here to check on me. I can't let him see me like this. I'm the oldest of the two of us, I'm supposed to be his guide, I can't let him see me upset.

"Namjoon please let me in. I just want to talk. What's going on?" He says whilst knocking on the door.

"Just go away, Tae. Please." I remarked back at him, sounding alot meaner than I had intended. I didn't mean it, I just can't let my weakest point be visible to his eyes.

"Look Namjoon, I don't know what happened today, but please. Just let me help you. Hiding from the problem isn't going to solve it." He says back.

"Taehyung! Go!" I shout. I Just want to be left alone. I don't need a pep talk or something like that. It won't change what's already happened. I hear him let out a defeated sigh.

"I'm right here if you change your mind. I'm gonna go see if Mom needs help with dinner." Taehyung says before walking away. I say nothing back. What more can I say?

~

                  Kim Taehyung

"Mom, I don't know what to do. Namjoon hyung won't even give me the time of day. Something upset him today. I know it. He looked like he was crying. What am I supposed to say?" I explain to my mother.

"Tae bear, it's really sweet that you care so much about your brother, but you know how he is. He doesn't like to talk about his problems right away. For now, it's best to just give him some space. If there's one thing I know about my oldest son, it's that he just needs some time to himself every once in a while. He'll tell us what happened later. He always does." My mom explains to me.

I guess I should give her the benefit of the doubt. She's raised us both on her own since Namjoon hyung was four and I was three. Our good for nothing father left us all in the dust when they first found out that my brother was autistic. I don't remember much from that day since I was still very young, but I do remember him saying these few words that still haunt my brother and I to this day. "I could never carry such a burden like that on my shoulders!"

Ever since that day, I've hated him, I've hated him so much, and I still hate him. I shouldn't but I just can't help it. Because of what he did. A scar was put in this family and that scar will never disappear. Mom has to work multiple shifts a week at her job just to provide for Namjoon and me. I have my own job to help her out and Namjoon is trying to find work but no one ever gives him a call back. It's just so frustrating, I just wish we had more money, the bills are just piling up on Mom.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I just wish he wouldn't shut us out all the time. I want to help him." I say back while cleaning off the kitchen table so it can be nice for when we eat.

"I know you do sweetie, but like I said, we have to be patient with him. He'll come to us when he's ready." Mom tells me while turning off the stove and preparing the plates for us.

"Joon-bug! Dinner's ready!" She shouts across the hall towards the direction of Namjoon's room.

"Coming!" I hear him say back. I sit down at the table and wait for him. When he enters the first thing that I see on his face are tear tracks. He definitely was crying.

Oh hyung. What happened today?

"There you are sweetheart. I made kimchee. I know it's your favorite." Mom tells him as he takes his seat at the table.