To All the Girls I've Loved Before

Chapter Four

-CHAPTER FOUR-
To the Girls Who Whirl in My Mind

My neighbor's eyes dart between myself, Jess, and Em, before they land right back onto my own.

"I need you to explain this to me" Margaret yanks out a crumbled up piece of paper from her pocket that I can only assume to be the letter I wrote to her.

"It's.. a letter." I tell her what she already knows, and Emery grabs my hand and squeezes it reassuringly, releasing me of my tension and worry.

She knows me too well.

Margaret gives me a look that tells me I better tell her the real answer, her brows furrowed and a look of determination prominent on her features.

"Ok, it's.. it's something I wrote to you a long time ago. Before you were ever with my brother. Back when we used to play in my backyard and you would come over for dinner practically daily," I pause for a moment, gauging her reaction before I continue, "I wrote that letter to you when I felt something for you. You were the first of five." I finish, scratching the back of my neck as I look away from everyone.

"What do you mean first of five?" She questions, a look of confusion visible on her features.

"I wrote five letters to five different girls who I had felt strongly for. Two of the other five just so happen to be in this very room right now.." I mutter that last part, but everyone seems to hear me as Jess and Emery chuckle a bit and Margaret blushes, seeming embarrassed.

"Oh." Is all that escapes her lips in response and the room falls silent until Emery speaks.

"Where's Nurse Janet?" She asks, causing us all to burst into laughter.

As if being summoned, Nurse Janet walks out from around the corner and smiles at everyone.

"I just had to hear how you guys were going to deal with the unique predicament before you. It's not like I could just ask 'what's the tea, sis?'" She explains, and we once again plunge into a sea of laughter at the Nurse's comment.

"Well, who are the other two ladies?" The Nurse questions, raising a perfect brow.

"Well, there's.. uh.. Skylar.." that's a lie, "and Addison, but she moved to Chicago and I haven't really kept in touch with her. I don't think she received her letter, thankfully."

The only reason I didn't mention Addison was because we haven't really kept in contact, unlike Jess and I, and I'm fairly sure she didn't get her letter.

Not to mention, she had a boyfriend at the time of me liking her, and I've always had this guilty feeling for feeling the way I did for her.

"That's interesting. I wish you all the best of luck." Nurse Janet responds with a kind smile, gesturing for us to take our leave.

She hands us our passes one after another as we exit the room and we all stop as we reach the hall.

"So you don't still feel that way about me?" Margaret asks, seeming to be holding her breath as she awaits my answer.

"No.. I don't." How could I?

She lets out a sigh of relief, her face breaking out into a soft smile.

"I'm glad. I'm not quite over you know who, and I've put my days of liking you behind me." Her words shock me, and I'm perplexed by the news.

Since when did she like me?

"You.. you liked me?" I question, dumbfounded.

"Of course. You're a very likable person, Hope, don't sound so shocked. You were always the sweetest, kindest person, still are to this day, and it doesn't hurt that you're cute." She explains with a light-hearted chuckle, a heart-felt smile directed right at me.

I smile back at her words, and feel my face heat up just a bit.

"Thank you." Is all I manage in response, nice and simple.

"I agree." Jess mumbles softly and I feel my ego inflate from negative two to zero.

Emery stays quiet, and seems to slightly nod, a look on her face that I can't decipher.

For whatever reason, I can't seem to be able to read her as of late.

"We better head to class." I say softly, breaking the silence, and with that everyone goes their own separate ways.