Friday's Appointments· Prince Rogers Nelson

Chapter 3: The Pill And The No

My eyes carefully scanned over each box on the three different shelves in front of me, each box were different colors, sizes and prices but they all did the same thing. I grabbed a random box without really looking before I headed straight for the register, grabbing a bottle of water on the way. I ignored the gaze the cashier gave me, looking down into my purse as I dug for my wallet before I looked at her. A minute of silence pasted before she told me my total; I gave her roughly a dollar extra but I didn't wait to get any change, I was already late for work. I had woken up that morning feeling sore and exhausted, and frantic when I realized that I had overslept by a whole hour. I didn't shower, put on any makeup and didn't even think twice about what I put on. It wasn't until I finally got to work and looked in the bathroom mirror to see my black skirt was covered with lint, my tan blazer didn't match the light green shirt I wore underneath but at least my black heels matched my skirt. I looked horrible, I felt horrible. I always did after a night with Lance. He was just so rough and demanding, he would tell me he knows I like it that way and for a while I believed him but deep down, I hated it. I hated the feeling of being used for sex like I often did when Lance and I were intimate. As I pondered it all in my head that morning, I came to realize that I had never exspirenced the sensation of making love. I had never truly felt the calming and safe touch of a man, Lance just wasn't that type of man. Once he wanted something, he got it. Regardless of what others thought, myself included. Sex was routine for us, he would grab me, tell me what he wanted me to do and would go at his own pace, doing whatever he liked. And while all of that was going on, I would lay there wondering what it would be like to enjoy something that everyone was supposed to.

I eventually snapped myself out of my thoughts when I realized I had been standing in front of the bathroom mirror at work for quite a while. I dug into my purse and pulled out the box of pills, along with the bottle of water I purchased. I popped one tablet from the foil and tossed it into the back of my mouth, quickly taking a large sip of water to wash it down. A part of me felt wrong, preventing a life from forming inside of me, but I would remind myself of the life the child would have if I let it happen. God knows how Lance would treat me sometimes, I couldn't stomach the thought of him treating our child the same way. It was just better this way. It was just easier to take the morning after pill then to worry about the environment my child would grow up in.

A loud knock came at the bathroom door which caused me to drop the box and the bottle of water, causing it to go all over the floor. "Shit!" I silently cursed and dropped to my knees to grab the soaked cardboard box, that fell apart in my hands.

"Sarah, are you in there?" It sounded like Lenny, the chief who came on Monday, Tuesday's and Wednesday's. Arthur was the chief who came in all of the other days.

"Yeah, Lenny. I'll be just a second!" I grabbed a handful of paper towels and tried to clean up all of the water, I managed to get my skirt wet in the process.

"Hey, everyone is looking for you. You're late." Another quiet curse slipped out when the box started to fall apart in my hands. I sighed and tossed the foil into my purse and stuffed what was left of the box into the trash can, under a couple pieces of trash. I waited for Lenny to leave before I finally managed to clean up the majority of the spilled water and straightened myself up and I rush out to my desk. I saw Lenny leaned over my desk, trying to figure out how to answer the phone, pressing several buttons and hanging up before he saw me. "Hey-Oh, Sarah..."

His tone and facial expression spoke volumes. "I know, I know. I'm late and I look awful." I shrugged past him and sat in my chair trying to sort through my messages that were piled up.