Different

*prologue*

Brian:

"Sorry, man. Things are just crazy now. Having 3 people here would be weird." 

Jonathan had this look on his face. Like he was trying not to be awkward but he heard it in his voice anyway. Mira was definitely not liking this conversation. Neither was I. Try being in my shoes. Both of them looked good, I guess. I thought we were a trio, like Harry, Hermoine, and Ron. At least I was Harry. 

I couldn't be surprised. This was coming for a long time already. I just needed a little longer. 

"Brian, please don't make that face. It makes me feel shittier than I already do." Wow, they are still thinking only of themselves. 

"Fine, yeah. Um, I'm good." No, I wasn't.

Now I have tears in my eyes. Shit. Not here, not here. 

"I'm gonna go now. Don't be sad. It's okay. I have no hard feelings. You go be happy. I'll be okay."

I just walked away, looking stupid, and invisible. Tears were blurring my vision and I ran down the hallway. Finding the bathroom, I ran in there like I had diarrhea. Thankfully no one was in there, and I walked in the stall. 

I just cried. Like a baby. Pathetically. One more on the list of things I have done to embarrass myself. Why does this happen to me? Why am I the one who has to leave? Why am I the one who is alone all the time? It is not fair, at all. 

Why can't I be happy?

Indiana:

"Are you okay?"

I snapped back to reality. I was in my room, and I spaced out. 

"Yeah, mom? What is it?" I was surprised that I didn't hear her come in. 

"I am worried. You have been distant lately. Do you need someone to talk to?" Her eyes were looking at me hard like she could pry an answer out if she tried enough. 

"No, I am okay. I am just trying to think about my homework. 

"Ok, fine. If you need someone to talk to, I am your person." Mom tried to look meaningful. 

"Yeah, definitely, I will." No, I won't. At this point, I was getting agitated. 

She took the hint and left. 

Now that I was alone, I could sit in peace. I was feeling depressed, but it wasn't a mental problem. I mean, it was, but not a chronic problem. I am sure it is the place in my life right now that is making me feel this way. 

I do what I always do, and put on my playlist. Music always makes me feel better, like a different version of myself. Powerful, and passionate. 

I don't have a favorite song. I have a lot of different songs that make me feel different ways, and that is what matters. 

Right now, it is the only thing that makes me feel like myself.