Begin Again [One Last Cry Sequel] [EDITING]

Part IV

I know I should apologize for being too harsh on him, but I was too shy to do that, rather embarrassed with my act towards him. I've realized that I've been too hard on him. I get it, I got hurt by Justin. I got cheated on, but Clark has nothing to do with it. He said words he didn't mean because he had no idea about my past. He's too innocent for my anger.

I shouldn't have vented out my hatred on any guy I get to meet just because Justin had been so unfaithful to me. His mistakes doesn't define every man in this world.

I've been too uptight with everyone because of my trust issues and all, but I realized that maybe I just learned a lesson through Justin, so that I would be ready for whatever this life has to offer me. I just learned my lesson the hard way, but it's not the end of everything. My life shouldn't end because of someone's mistake. I'll get over him and start anew. I reckon that's the best revenge that I could do to him and the best gift that I could give to myself.

And in order for that to happen, I should stop pushing people away from my life. I should stop being a bitter brat who couldn't stop dwelling in her past. Besides, it's already done. Too bad for my liking, but I couldn't change what had occurred. I can only let go of it, and make the present and future better.

I was biting my lower lip while tapping my book. I decided to read to divert my attention, but I can't concentrate knowing I hurt someone's feelings. I feel so guilty. Should I talk to him now? Gosh! Why is it so hard to swallow my pride? My parents didn't raised me to be harsh on people who's only trying to comfort me, and get in touch with me. I bet they would be so disappointed with me if they learn about this, and I won't let that happen.. not because I want to come clean, but because I learned that my actions had been really harsh, and that I should really apologize.. like right now.

I stood up and went to Clark's room. I don't know if I should knock or what, but nothing's gonna happen if I will just stand here and fight myself. It's almost 5 in the evening, and there's no sign of my parents in the house. I wonder where they are.

After a couple of minutes of arguing with myself, I know it's silly. I finally made myself to knock in Clark's room, but no one's opening the door. Is he out? Maybe he's with my parents? Maybe he's mad at me that he chose to go out with my parents instead of spending the day here with me.

I was about to leave when I heard the doorknob clicked. I held my breath when he opened it, and my eyeballs almost fell down on the floor. Why was he naked?! I turned around.. definitely blushing! Gosh. Okay.. he's not totally nude, but kinda like that although he still has his boxer on.

"Oh f*ck wait!" He cussed.

I heard the door shot behind me. I took deep breathes to calm myself down. What was that? And why am I blushing? I can feel that my face was burning red already. I think I need to go.

I was about to leave when the door behind me opened. I bit my lower lip and closed my eyes. Sheez! This is too flustering!

I awkwardly faced him, and faked a smile.

"Uhm. Hi? Did I bother you or what?" I shyly asked.

"Ah no. I was just sleeping. Sorry about that." He said.

For a minute we were both engaged in a deafening silence. I don't know how to start this kind of conversation.

So he was sleeping and not out with my parents because he didn't want to spend the day here with me?

I decided to finally break the silence and do what I came here for.

"I'm sorry." I looked at him and it's palpable that he's still sleepy and totally clueless with what I'm doing. Like who wouldn't? I had been so uptight on him, and here I am.. apologizing.

"I shouldn't be so harsh on you. I was eaten by my anger and sadness. I've been a brat on you since day one, and I'm really sorry. Please forget about what I said earlier. I was just mad, I didn't mean what I said."

"You were mad." He began. "Do you know that mad people's words are legit af? It's what they feel and also what they think that come's out of their mouth, which means they mean it. It's a reckless action tho, so why are you sorry for being real?"

I was stunned and couldn't make myself to talk. What's he saying?

"I accept your apology tho. It's fine, no biggie." He said.

I kinda feel offended, is he being sarcastic? Oh my gosh! How dare he?!

He probably noticed my reaction, and I don't know if it's just me or what, but I think I saw him scared.. like he's scared for his life and that made me loosen up a little.

"H-hey Freya! Don't give me that look. Uh, do you wanna come in?" he offered.

My eyes widened. Did he just invited me to come in his room?! Gross thoughts filled my head, so I promptly said 'no' to him. What was I thinking? Gosh Freya don't be so green-minded.

We decided to go to the living room and have some snacks together. This is like our first bonding since he stepped a foot in this house. It's still awkward, but maybe we'll get used to each other eventually. Besides we'll both be seeing more of each other now that we're under the same roof.

We talked about random stuff to get to know each other. He's actually... funny. And I like this side of him. He told me things about his childhood and his school stuff.

"I thought we'll never get to have a decent conversation without you getting mad at me." He stated.

I rolled my eyes on him and we laughed. This actually feels good. Talking to him and getting to know him. I could tell that he's a good guy.

We didn't noticed time until my parents came home from who-knows-where-they-went. I kissed my mom and she whispered something in my ear like "I told you he's a good guy." I just smiled at her and nod a little. Yeah right, he sure is.

We ate dinner and talk about random stuff. My mom's really the one who talked a lot tho.

"So what's your plan after college Clark?" she asked.

I looked at Clark who's also looking at me, I smiled at him and he returned it before looking at my mom. O...kay? What was that?

"Dad already offered me a job after college, so I'll guess I'll go for it to earn some experience. I'll be needing lots of that as a fresh grad." He answered.

"Good for you. How about you Freya? What's your plan after college?" Mom asked.

They all looked at me and all of a sudden I felt like I was in the hot seat. O...kay?

"Uhm. I'm thinking about applying for a job downtown." Truth be told, I still really don't have plan after college. I'm still figuring everything out for my sake.

After dinner, mom and dad promptly went to their room which leaves me here with Clark. We had a cup of tea and a little talk before going to our respective rooms.

"Good night." He said and smiled at me.

"Yeah.. good night." I smiled back and closed the door behind me. I smiled to myself.

I guess this is a good start.