Begin Again [One Last Cry Sequel] [EDITING]

Part XIII

How would you know if you already found the one? Is there a signage that says "Stop! You're on your love final destination."?

How would you know it was your final shot to a happy ever after? If that's even real.

Everything has changed in a blink of an eye. Yesterday I was so hurt after finding out that Justin cheated on me. I was off and was distant to every one. I couldn't trust other people anymore, but now... I had no idea how this is happening, but I am trusting this guy beside me with my all.

"I guess we're stuck here for the night Freya. Don't worry I'll keep you safe. Trust me." He said.

And without second thoughts, I found myself nodding my head.

He curled his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. I rested my face in his masculine chest, and like a kid hugging her father--- I feel safe. I was so lost in this feeling. And literally lost in this wilderness with Clark. It's my fault tho, curiosity got into me, so I followed the little firefly I saw earlier whilst every one was getting ready for a bonfire party. But on second thought, had I not did that.. I wouldn't be able to spend this much time with him.

"I'm sorry for dragging you here, Clark." I whispered.

"It's not your fault. It's my choice to follow you." He said.

I heaved a sigh. We couldn't find our way back because it was already dark. Maybe they'll look for us--- or maybe they're too busy enjoying the bonfire to notice our absence. I reckon we really have to wait until morning here. I just really hope that there was no wild beast or snakes here.

Clark made a little fire for the both of us out of woods and stones which he learned from his grandfather and it really helps a lot because it was getting really cold here.

We were hugging each other, and I should've been protesting but I'm not. It feels right to be hugged by him.. to be lost with him.

We lie down on the grass while I rested my head in his chest and his protective arms enveloped around me. It feels so good staying this close to him.

We're friends... but are we allowed to do this?

"Can you imagine what it's like to be alone up there? I bet the moon feels lonely."  Clark asked while pointing to the moon.

I looked up the moon, and saw how magnificent it was. I've always loved looking at it since I was a kid. It feels so calming, but what if Clark was right? What if the moon's really lonely?

"I don't know. Maybe it's sad, and maybe not." I answered.

"Hmm?"

"There's only one moon, and maybe just like humans.. He had been so used to being alone. Maybe he's sad, and maybe not, because countless people around the world loves the moon so much, maybe that makes him happy despite of being alone up there. After all... all that it takes to keep going is to know that you are loved." I stated.

He chuckled a little and tap my arms.

"My girl's very clever." He blurted out.

I was moved. I sat and stared at him. What did he just say?

"Your girl?" I asked confused.

"Err.. yeah? I'm not your man, but you're my girl. It doesn't have to be mutual. You don't have to like me back, because honestly having you around is more than enough Freya." He said while looking straight into my eyes. And I knew he was serious.

I am lost for words. I had no idea what to say. Maybe I shouldn't say anything, or maybe I should. I really don't know. Cat got my tongue and suddenly everything around me was a blur and I couldn't hear anything but my heart skipping a beat every 0.5 second, and if this won't stop I'm sure I'll be dead.

Maybe I'm in denial about my feelings  for Clark. Maybe I just couldn't make myself to admit that I was really moved because of this guy. That from a girl who was hurt, and betrayed and distant.. I am now a better and happier version of myself because of him. He didn't even have to put much effort.

He didn't even have to do anything sweet and fancy or shower me with flowery words. I just often find myself lost when he's near. It's as though there was some magnet in him that kept me want to be close to him. But being me who's really denial.. I tried to push him away. I have tried to be a b*tch to him from the very first day, because the truth is.. I'd been under his spell from the first time that I saw him, and I just couldn't accept it. I just couldn't accept that I was feeling this way over him because I was so afraid of getting hurt again. I was so frightened of trusting other people again, and it's awful.

But now... I wanted to stop fighting it, and just give in, but I'm still afraid of taking chances. I'm afraid I'll make the same mistake again because what if he's just here to test me? What if he's another Justin I'll regret giving my love and effort and time? What if I ended up regretting everything again?

And also... what if I don't? What if he's really different? What if this is my last shot? What if he was Heaven sent? What if he's my safe haven? There's so much what if's I wish I could answer. There's so much on my mind, and it's making me feel restless.

"Clark...." t'was his name all that I could say.

"Shhh." He hushed me and pulled me back into a hug.

Resting in his chest and hearing his heartbeat was calming, but what if I couldn't do this again? what if there's no next time for this moment?

What if now is all I have?