It's crazy when you come to realize how toxic you're hometown really is. Of all my 18 years... this has what it's come too. Lies, manipulation, fake, toxicity, horrible people. And no, I'm not just saying the teenagers, adults are that way too. And it just blows my mind how rude people can be towards each other. Hating on kids, cheating and lying, playing someone's heart strings like they are easily playing an instrument and when they get bored, they toss it away. So much has happened these past years not just for me, but for others... I've always been the quiet kid in the room. I've watched people like movies, seeing things happen and wondering what I would do, if that happened to me. And I do think about what I would do but I can never figure out what exactly. I sit there baffled on how they can soak up what just happened to them and act like they are ok. But then I realize.... they aren't taking it like a champ. Instead, they act out that way to other people and it's like a chain... people start treating other's horribly. All because of one thing... Watching this all unfold was blinding for me to watch. And then... it happened to me. And instead of taking it out on others, I sat there and cried, started partying, drinking, getting into trouble and nobody could stop me. I sat there on the edge of life at times and wondered what could have happened differently if I were to be toxic... but I could never wish toxicity onto someone. Living simply and positively is what I do and I think everyone should live that way. No more hate, no more lies, manipulation, fake, horrible people. No more toxicity. And maybe just maybe... would I love my hometown again.
