Forever over

Five

(Flynn in the picture)

I was hiding for the rest of the day. Didn't even sleep at all that night. But this time it wasn't because of the thoughts about Ice. This time all I could think about was Robin. The way he smiled at me when I felt down because of what everyone would say about me. How he always made sure I stayed healthy, basically forced the healthy diet on me. We may not have been friends, but he had always been there for me. And I had been there for him. We had been close. 

And I had shattered that trust. I had hurt him.

Maybe... I didn't want it to be true, but maybe Becky was right about me. Maybe I really was dangerous. It was scary, the thought of how easily I had snapped. Especially considering how confident I had become in my self control lately. And then there were the things he'd said. About how everyone was sick of my attitude. Was that true? I guess I really did have double standards, but what teenager didn't? Especially werewolf teenagers.

I sighed, really wishing I could sleep now. I could barely think at all at this point. My eyes felt heavy and my head hurt, I could barely even lift my arm. But my body still refused to let sleep come. Why? Was it some sort of punishment for sleeping with my sister's mate and hurting Robin? If so then it was definitely a very effective kind of torture.

The sound of a knock brought me back into reality, but I didn't answer. Didn't even have to, apparently, because someone opened the door carefully. "Crow?", a familiar voice asked softly. "You haven't been to breakfast. Or dinner. Are you alright?"

"No", my mouth answered without my consent, too tired to lie. I could hear the door being shut, a few steps. Not long after Flynn appeared in my line of vision. He sat down on the edge of my bed carefully. He didn't say anything and neither did I for a while, but finally my mind decided to just spit out what I was thinking: "I hurt Robin. I just... lost control. I tried to hold back and I tried to tell him. I promise, I tried. I didn't mean to, Flynn. I promise I didn't mean to... I'm so sorry. I'm sorry."

Silence.

Then, after a while Flynn's voice finally echoed around us, though it sounded unsure: "That... That was you? The marks on Rob's arm and face?" How did he not know yet? I just nodded. No need to hide it, Robin had probably told everyone already anyway. As he should. But to my surprise Flynn just sighed. "I guess that explains why he didn't want to say who it was... We tried to get him to talk for hours, but you know how stubborn he can be. We figured it was someone close then."

Ouch. Now I felt bad for thinking that way. Of cause Robin hadn't said a single word. Stupid, loyal bastard! He had every right to throw me under the bus. But for him to still keep me safe? That made my betrayal towards him even worse.

"But... Why, Crow? What happened? I thought you were safe?" I flinched when that word left his mouth.

Safe, huh? The expression to state that a wild one, like me, had their instincts under control enough to not go feral, apparently unlike me. I thought I was. I really, really thought I was safe. But... "I snapped." These two words burned my tongue, and yet I knew I had to tell him. He deserved to know. Flynn and Robin weren't exactly close, but Robin's sister was mated to Flynn's brother. Before he rejected her and left the pack, at least. That'd been the same time he cut ties with me. Ace was weird like that. A clean cut, but still in touch... Wait, what was I talking about? Right: "Becky was telling lies about him. He didn't believe me, got angry, said some stuff... Do you really hate my guts?"