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it's been 3 months

and i've tried to put my feelings away but i'm crazy about joey and i need to tell him

we are going out for lunch today just us

i told him i need to tell him something very important

he said he has something to tell me

i gave penelope to tammy

i met joey at a coffee house and ordered for the both of us

he showed up a bit late and had messy hair

"hey"he smiles sitting across from me

"hey"i smile

"so i need to tell you something"he smiles widely

"so do i but you go first"i say

"ok well i want to ask someone to marry me"he says

i choke on my drink

i feel a pain in my chest

i think my heart just actually broke

"what?"i ask

"there's this girl her name is kami and she is just amazing. i love her i truly love her. she's the one i'm sure of it! i've told her all about p and she's so excited to meet her"he says

"when did you meet her?"i ask

"like three months ago i know it's quick but i'm sure she's THE one"he says

"well i'm happy for you"i fake smile

"i need your help picking a ring for her, and i'm gonna need help arranging the whole question thing"he says

"of course i'll help"i say

"great ok now what were you going to tell me?"he asks

"i-i was thinking about putting p into ballet"i say

"i mean if you want to let's go for it"he says i smile and nod

we finish our drink and talk ab this kami girl

this is living hell

i forced my self to cry internally and not externally

"let's go look at rings"he says

"sure"i say

we go to the mall and go into an antic shop

"i want the perfecting for the perfect girl"he says to the lady

she showed him their variety and he said 'none of them are good enough' so we went to a jewelry shop and i looked around

i saw a stunning ring

"joey come here"i say and show him the ring

"it's perfect"he gasps

"i'll take it"he smiles the lady gets the ring

"we have free engravings"the lady says

"should i?"he asks i nod

"what's your name?"the lady asks me

"oh no no no it's not for me"i say

"kami, k, a, m, i"he says

NO

ARIA, a, r, i, a!

thats should be me

{hOlDiN uR hAnD}

"oh shit joey i got to go i'll see you soon"i kiss his cheek

"ok bye love you"he says

i leave as fast as i could and get to my car and break down
m
i'm ugly crying

i drive home and go straight to my room

tammy comes over with the kids

they play while tammy and i talk

"he's getting married tammy. married"i cry

"she could say no"tammy says

"but then he will be heart broken!"i cry

"it's gonna be ok! you'll get over him soon"she rubs my back

"how could i he's always around and when he's not i have a mini him running around the place"i cry

" i know it's going to be hard"she sighs

i close my eyes and drift off to sleep

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i just want to fall in love man

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