i hope you lie to me

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i really hope your answer to the question i asked isn't what i'm dreading to hear, i hope that for once; i hope that you're not true to your words

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i really hope your answer to the question i asked isn't what i'm dreading to hear, i hope that for once; i hope that you're not true to your words. i hope that you lie to me, because otherwise i wouldn't be able to handle it.
i grew so used to your tender, warm words; anything other that that pushes me to the edge.

you were my rock, you held me when i reached rock bottom. you were always there, a warm hug, a welcoming smile; a heart of gold. that's what you were to me.

remember all our dates? we went to cafes, on road trips, macdonalds drive thrus, heck- we even went out for icecream at 3 am; you gave me something i'd never forget. 

you were always there for me, i was always there for you. we were so close to perfect, god; we were so close- guess we're that one couple that didn't get the dreamy fairy tale ending everyone thought we'd get.

i'd never trade what you gave me for the world though; deja vu.

maybe in an alternate universe we'd still be together, maybe i'm happier there. but i'm here, and i can't change anything. i love you, i acknowledge that i can't have you anymore; that i can't call you mine anymore.
i just really hope you wouldn't forget me, i hope you remember me as much as i'll remember you.
i'll always want you back, and i hate myself for that; my love for you will never fade.

-256 words, 14/7/2019

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