FU - Fucker's Unite || 🗿💸

Sucker101

Note from the sucka, 2019

🗿💸 Grandpa, if you read this please provide me with some money. I'm broke as fuck. Loven't ya🗿💸

Chap. 1

Yuta: May all the birds shit on me if I step outside the house for three milleniums *breaths out, shows a plastic smile* 

Chanyeol: Even That shit would be way too expensive for a loser like you.

Yuta: Aww how sweet of you *fake squeals* Now shut your bubble gum mouth up. Not gonna ruin my mood-

Chanyeol: *laughing* What mood are you talking about? Being a snake and making butthead comments all day? SURE, hundred percent would love to hear all of it.

Yuta: *sticks his tongue out at Chanyeol* Better than crying over bitches all day, like who even cares 'bout those lame things these days. You're the real loser, just man up and bear with the fact~ *looks at his nails as if he's just done them*

Chanyeol: Look at the sucker talking-

Yuta: At least I suck well.

Chanyeol: *puts on a bored with life face* sucker is still a sucker, yuta if you didn't know this I can educate you further.

Yuta: *mocking*  we suck a lot of things, Mr Elephant-I-Can't-You.

Chanyeol: *disgusted* Not us, humans. Ew... Sucker is a sucker, adjective, as in to describe the person's charac-

Yuta: *Ignoring the older's comment & goes on rambling* We do suck a lot in life. We don't realize but yeah we do suck a lot. Like, kids suck those ball candies, we gays suck those motha fucka balls and you- unhumanly creatures with elephant DNA- you just suck at life. You just suck at being humans *finishes with a smirk, looking at the older to check his stunned gaze*

Chanyeol: I-

Yuta:  Oh and no need to educate me any more. You suck at it, too. Congrats man you got so many sucking skills. *amused*

Chanyeol: Man, I'm done talking to you. You just- I don't know, man, there's something wrong with your brain *flails hands around in an attempt to describe the condition*

Yuta: Uh sorry, I forgot *grins* yall elephants can't fully understand what humans say. Tsk, what a shame.

Chanyeol: *fed up with yuta's sneaky comments* Go, fuck yourself!

Yuta: Who said I don't do that? *wiggling eyebrows*

Chanyeol: *rubbing his temples to calm himself down* you're unbelieveable, I see why you have no friends.

Yuta: tsk, how sad. *wiping fake tears* Dear god, what did I ever do to deserve this? I'm so lonely, no one wants me, no one needs me.

Chanyeol: *sitting down next to Yuta*  You done there?

Yuta: want me to continue?

Chanyeol: hundred percent nope

Yuta: I'll stop only if you give me the permission to do so, dear lord *makes a cross with his fingers*

Chanyeol: you're annoying

Yuta: you suck

Chanyeol: you suck way more

Yuta: *shrugs* true *silent* but I look good while sucking and that's important, that's the only thing that matters.

Chanyeol: *In disbelief* and here I thought we were done with this-

Yuta: with what? You being a sucker? You being a loser?

Chanyeol: with your bullshit, sir

Yuta: it's called a humanshit, if the only bull in my life aka Ferdinand was talking, then sure it would be bullshit, but I'm a human, thus it's a humanshit. But if you talk shit then it's called-

Chanyeol: *interupts with irritation* I swear to god, if you're gonna say elephantshit-

Yuta: *claps* You just made me go wow. Seems like elephant community is getting better at human logic *pets the older's head like a proud mom* that's it. My life's complete now. I brought up a true elephant. Papi is proud.

Chanyeol: *yanks himself away, glaring at yuta* Man, why not make a Sucker101.com? 100 % fits your personality

Yuta: That could actually make me rich *amused, considering the idea*

Chanyeol: *lost* how even?

Yuta: There are tons of pricks who want their Pee-pee's to be sucked, if I invest & devote all my energy and time into developping that website... *going further into calculations, while Chanyeol stares at him with the-fuck-you-want-human face* As I was saying, those pricks would pay me money to suck 'em off, they would pay me toooons of moneyy to be more exact. Ey papi *dreamy* make it rain for me papi *raises hands in the air as if he's catching money here and there* Sucka baby is rich! I can finally manage my egg collection-

Chanyeol: Snap out of it hoe *deeply annoyed, gets up and smacks yuta's head* Imma break your egg collection or whatever. What kind of a human dreams of having an egg collection anyway?

Yuta: Me! I do!

Chanyeol: Keep on dreaming then. Forget your Imma-Yearn-Million plan. That's dumb. Even dumber than you.

Yuta: I don't know if I should be offended or not.

Chanyeol: Offended, I suggest.

Yuta: You're a wise creature, Imma believe you *bows* Thank you, lord for always educating me. Now you can leave.

Chanyeol: Would not wanna stay in this shit house anyway. It smells like stupid ideas..And also sperm, yeah.

Yuta: Sorry oldass, too lazy to make it clean 'n fresh for you *rolls eyes*

Chanyeol: *shakes head & yells on his way to the door* G'bye sucka. Hope to never see your face again. I'm divorcing out of this friendship.

Yuta: *raises a middle finger behind the older's back, smiles satisfied*