She Alpha

Thirty

Picture// Riley Black

"Hey, Mom." I smile down at the grey headstone.

I begged the tears to not fall, hoping to make it through without a breakdown.

"I'm getting married tomorrow." I choke out, my breath trembling.

"I think you would really love Alex, he's so sweet and considerate- I love him." I tell her, as if she was sitting right next to me.

"Kody has been planning the wedding with his mate, they're a huge help- but you would think he was planning the Queen of Englands wedding." I chuckled.

Kody and Casper had come back from Blood Moon to help Alex and I out with the wedding planning.

Kody quickly became insane with the planning- he ever has a clipboard and an earpiece.

I don't know who he talks to with that thing, but I let him do as he pleases seeing as how he had helped me so much.

"I wish you were here." I tell my mom, a tear streaming down my face.

"You too, dad." I glance over at his headstone with a sad smile.

"I think I understand now why you did it." I tell him with a nod.

"At the time, I didn't understand. But I have someone who I couldn't live without now too." My voice wavers slightly as I picture my father's face in my head.

"So it's okay, dad. I want you to know that I forgive you." I finish, making sure that I told him that, whether he could actually hear me or not. 

Maybe the forgiveness was more for myself than anyone. I needed to feel okay and not hold this grudge and hurt any longer.

That hurt has taken over the last four years of my life and I'm ready to take it back.

I wanted a new life with with Alex and that meant leaving the old Riley behind.

I stand on shaky feet, staring down at the headstones one more time with a sad smile.

"I love you both." I murmur.

•••

I traveled back to the pack house with a light feeling in my heart.

It had felt like the world had been lifted off my shoulders, and I quickly became addicted to this feeling.

Being an Alpha, I was automatically a pessimist.

Alphas weren't meant to have things for very long; which is why you fight like hell.

I now know that Alex and I would have each other forever, because our bond went deeper than just love.

"Hey there, Alpha." His warm voice floats from our office, as he sits behind the large oak desk.

I had an extra chair placed right next to mine, so that we could work in unison.

Splitting the work in half has allowed me to get out of the office more.

"Hey, there human." I smile back at his warm caramel eyes, falling into his lap and wrapping my arms around his muscular shoulders.

He places a warm kiss on my forehead, making tingles spiral from his lips onto my skin.

I shut my eyes at the feeling.

"How did it go?" He asks softly, setting his pen down and looking into my eyes with all of his attention.

I smiled, "It went great, I felt like they were actually listening."

Visiting my parents gravesite was Alex's idea.

At first, I was reluctant- mostly because I hadn't been to their graves since their joint funeral.

I guess I was also scared to finally face the fact that they are gone, and life will still move on.

"I'm so proud of you, Riles." He kisses my cheek, wrapping his strong arms around my waist as I sit across his lap.

I grin softly at him, laying my head on his chest.

Moments like these, I wished to live in forever.

But moments weren't meant to last forever, and that was something I had learned the hard way very early on.

Memories are the only thing that can pause time, and right now- I was memorizing every part of this warm feeling.

"I love you." I mumble, lifting my head to meet his eyes.

He smiles brightly, the way he always does when I say that.

"I love you." He responds, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Shouts from outside the door make me raise up, the sound of my obnoxious best friend on the other side of the door.

"Riley!" He shouts, opening the door to the office.

"Hey, Alex have you seen Riley-" His eyes stop on our figures, his brow raising.

I laugh at his clipboard and earpiece, and Casper who looks at me with pleading eyes.

"Oh, so we're not observing the tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding?" Kody scoffs.

Rolling my eyes, I peck Alex's lips before sliding off of his lap.

"Cock-block." Alex mumbles, prompting Kody to flip him off.

"Relax, Kody, I was just checking in on some paperwork." I lie, walking towards him.

He rolls his eyes at me, but Casper sends me a wink.

"Yeah okay, haven't you learned that lying to me is worthless." He quirks a brow.

I shake my head with a smile.

"Whatever." I mutter, turning around to give my mate a smile.

Alex smirks at me, "Kody, give us one second to say goodnight."

Kody groans, towing Casper into the hall.

I close the door behind him, Alex raising from his chair to meet me halfway.

"Are you nervous?" He asks, wrapping his arms around my waist.

I place my hand on his cheek, the stubble rough on my palm.

"I'm not nervous actually, I'm ready to marry you." I smile at him, feeling at peace with taking his last name.

He grins down at me.

"Me too, I can't wait." He laugh lightly.

"Goodnight, Mr. West." I place a loving kiss on his warm lips.

He returns the gesture, holding the back of my neck to press his lips more into mine.

"Goodnight, Mrs. West." He whispers against my lips.

A shudder goes down my spine at his words, wishing to hear him repeat them over and over again.