SURRENDER || ethma

the study date

emma:

I've always been the type of person who texts back fast. I'm that annoying girl who constantly checks her phone when she has a boyfriend, just because I love constantly talking to them.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still independent. I haven't had a boyfriend since Ethan, and I honestly haven't wanted one. As much as I hate to admit it, my relationship with Ethan helped me realize that most of the time - no matter how perfect things may seem - boys will always be boys.

So now I just don't trust anyone. No matter how sweet or genuine they seem, they don't appeal to me.

So why am I so affected by Ethan saying one sentence to me, hours ago?

It's all I've been able to think about since it happened. And I hate myself for it.

All throughout the school day, I made sure to avoid Ethan even more than usual. I even got to the English class I have with him early so I could snag the seat farthest from him, and practically ran out of the room as soon as the bell rang. And yet I still felt his eyes on me as I cascaded down the hallway.

By the time I got to my next class, I had a single text from a number I never got around to unsaving that I swear I've been staring at for two hours now.

Ethan:
meet me after school. library. hear me out em.

Every time my eyes glance over my nickname, I feel a twinge of pain in my heart. Everyone calls me Em. So why does it hurt so bad when he does it?

I instantly told Jess about it, who encouraged me to at least talk to him.

"Emma, he wants to meet you at the library. Come on. How sinister can that really be?"

Which I suppose she has a point. Maybe Ethan really does need my help with something. Maybe he's not going to be rude or arrogant, and maybe if I go we could even repair our friendship.

But despite all of that, I know I'd get drawn back in. Not purposefully. But when I look into his eyes I can't help but see every memory of us flash through my mind. I can't help but miss the way things used to be, just a little bit. I can't help that he still does and always will affect me. In the worst way possible.

So I had it in my head that I wasn't gonna go. I was sure of it.

Until he texted me again.

Ethan:
I'll bring u an iced latte if u come :) as a peace offering

And while I can somehow manage to resist Ethan, I can never manage to resist coffee.

Emma:
Make sure to get it with almond milk.

—

ethan:

I smile at my phone ridiculously as I read over Emma's text. Of course that would get her. I still know her too well.

She didn't even need to tell me to get it with almond milk - as if I'd let her drink dairy, no matter how much I dislike her.

But it's a good thing she said yes, because I had skipped last period to run out to Philz and grab us both a coffee. What can I say? I'm dedicated now.

It's not even about the money, really. It's more about proving a point to myself and to Emma. Proving that no matter how much she thinks she hates me, she never really will.

Besides, I have the perfect plan in my head. One that Emma can't say no to. Because even though the girl has a lot of faults, she's smart as hell. One of the top in our class, probably. Passing all of her classes with an A.