SURRENDER || ethma

the bet

emma:

Relationships have never really been my thing. Ever since middle school, anytime I have any type of romantic tie to someone, it always ends badly.

For example, in the 7th grade I dated Hunter Peterson. It lasted about two weeks, and three weeks later he was calling me a whore and telling everyone I sent him nudes (when I didn't) and showing them a Google stock photo of a woman's thighs, with sexy underwear to sport. At least nobody was stupid enough to believe him, even at 13.

In ninth grade, I started dating Sean Freeman. He was nice at first. Until he started trying to have sex with me. I declined, being 15 and terrified at the thought of someone looking at me in such a vulnerable way, and he got mad and told me he never wanted to see me again.

And yet the worst of them all came in my junior year of high school. He was my biggest heart break in disguise as the most perfect human I'd ever seen. And his name is Ethan Dolan.

Ethan and his brother, Grayson, and I had always known each other. We grew up going to school together and having mutual friends, so eventually we all became close friends too. I valued my friendship with the both of them greatly. But I had always felt more drawn to Ethan in a way I couldn't really explain.

We had a connection beyond just friendship. And in junior year, Grayson started playing football, leaving Ethan and I alone to hang out and explore that connection while he was at practice. It was like I blinked and suddenly I was falling hard for one of my best friends. It didn't take long for him to confess he felt the same way. And I was lovestruck.

We would cuddle every day after school, watching stupid movies we didn't care about. He'd kiss me softly and always move my hair away from my face when he did it - which led to me often ditching my signature ponytail just so he could do it more frequently. And he was funny. God, his humor matched mine perfectly, and when he laughed I could always feel myself melting further into him.

For a while things were really great.

Until our six month anniversary.

We got into a huge argument over an old friend of mine named Weston. He had liked me before, but I never saw him that way, and we left it at that. But he just so happened to be at a friends birthday party and we hung out, and Ethan was pissed about it.

Most of the argument is a blur to me. I was so mad and hurt that I just remember the worst of it when I think about it, so I always try not to. But the argument wasn't even the worst of it. Not even close. We honestly probably could've bounced back from it, despite what awful things were said. It's the aftermath that ruined us.

Ethan had left my house in a rage that night. A rage that led him straight to his ex Shelby's house and into her bed. I guess he thought I wouldn't find out, or he just didn't care, but Shelby had posted a picture of her and a very shirtless Ethan on Snapchat that night. I'm not stupid - I put the pieces together pretty easily. And that's the last time I've had any type of interaction with him.

At school, we avoid each other as much as possible. When we make plans, we ask friends ahead of time to make sure the other person won't be there. Hell, most of our friends know better than to even bring up the other person in conversation.

Until today.

I don't know why Ethan woke up today and decided things would be different. I have no idea what was crossing his mind as he walked down the school hallway, headed directly towards me. And I definitely don't know what possessed him to actually speak to me for the first time in almost a year.

My best friend, Jess, seemed to be thinking the same thing as her jaw practically dropped to the floor before he could even get a word out. I gently nudged her, urging her to knock it off. I didn't want people to make a big deal out of Ethan simply talking to me. We had the same friend group - it was bound to happen at some point, I suppose.