Solangelo Oneshots and AU's :P

Illnesses and Control: pt 1

A/N

Okay, so, this chapter covers eating disorders, something I'm trying to recover from. Please don't read if you are sensitive to this topic. Trust me, ED's suck and you don't want one. If you have any of these symptoms, please, message me. I'll understand what you're talking about and feeling. You're perfect just the way you are. No one should care about your weight. It doesn't matter, if they can't see that, they don't deserve you. Also, I'm using how I felt, for Nico. This may be a little different than other people's point of view on themselves, but mine wasn't just my weight, like it was yeah, but it was also over the fact that I don't have any control over anything, I felt, and still do sometimes, that my weight was the only thing I had control over. ALSO! GUYS GET ED'S TOO!

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Nico

I scrape most of the salad into the fire, leaving about 3 bites left. I walk back over to my table, sitting down and chugging the glass of water next to me. As I pick up my fork, Will sits down next to me. 

 "Hey, Sunshine!" he says cheerily. I glance at him, set down my fork, and get my glass of water, chugging it again. Once the clear liquid is gone, I look at him. "Hi." I mumble. 

 "What's wrong?" he asks gently, placing a hand on mine. I jump at the sudden contact. I'm still not used to it, even if he is my boyfriend.

 "N-Nothing. Aren't you supposed to be at the Apollo table?" I ask. He nods. "Yeah, but I wanted to see my beautiful boyfriend first." he replies, looking around to make sure no one sees before kissing my forehead. "Sorry, I know you don't like it in public, but I missed you. Like, alot. Maybe we can hangout in your cabin instead of going to the campfire? My shift ended 30 minutes ago and my next isn't until after lunch tomorrow." he says quickly. I blush. "I-It's fine." I stutter. Will grins, standing up. "Okay, see you in a bit." He walks back over to his table and I smile, taking  a bite of the salad. Just that one bite grosses me out. I shove the next two into my mouth, downing 3 more glasses of water, and walk back to my cabin. I tap my sword against the door, hearing the click as it unlocks. 

As soon as I shut the door, I rush to the bathroom. I step onto the scale. 106.3. I glare at the number as I step off. I rummage through the drawer, looking for the marker. I remove my clothes, shooting a glare at the mirror as I begin marking myself. suddenly I here a knock at the door. I ignore it, knowing it's Will and he has the key. Then it hits me. It's Will, he doesn't care what I'm doing, he'll walk in. If he walks in, he'll catch me marking. Shit. Before I can put the marker away, my boyfriend walks in, seeing me holding a red marker in my boxers and the circles all over my skin. 

 "Neeks... baby.... no." he murmurs, grabbing me and crushing me into a hug. "Honey, you're perfectly fine." he says into my shoulder. I feel the sleeve become wet and realize, he's crying. 

 "Will, why are you crying?" I ask, pulling away slightly to look at him. Instead of answering he grips my sides, staring at my torso. "Will? Hello? What's wrong?" I ask. "Nico... I can count your ribs, c'mon. Put your clothes back on." he says, letting me go. I pull my shirt and jeans back on, confused. "Why?" I ask when I'm finished. Instead of answering, he grabs my hand, dragging me to the infirmiry. I realize what's going on as we walk into the infirmiry. I yank my hand away. 

 "Will. Stop." I say. He turns, tears in his eyes. "No." he says, taking my hand back, a little more forceful this time. 

 "I said, stop!" I say a little louder, taking my hand back angrily. I can feel the other people in the room staring at us, but I don't care right now. "I'm fine." I mutter. 

 "No, you're not." he scoffs. "Yes, I am." I say quietly. "Oh? What all have you eaten today?" he asks, knowing I can't lie to him. "4 bites of an omlette with 6 glasses of water for breakfast. 4 glasses of water and an apple for lunch and 3 bites of salad with 5 glasses of water for dinner." I reply, glaring at him. "And exercise?" he asks, grabbing my arm and dragging me to a private room.

 "Um, I ran the track twice after breakfast, the practiced sword fighting all afternoon, except from 3-4 when I was teaching a class, and even then I was practicing with my sword." I say, my voice picking up volume as he shuts the door.

 "Sit." he whispers, pointing at the bed. I roll my eyes and sit down, watching him leave and come back with an IV. He pulgs it in next to the bed, grabbing my arm gently and cleaning it. 

 "Sorry, I have to inject this in your arm." he says, poking it into my wrist. I whimper and bite my lip as the needle draws blood. He quickly wraps my arm, making sure it won't fall out.

He sits down across from me on the bed, crossing his legs. "Why are you doing this? What's the point, love?" he asks gently, taking my hand and kissing it. I watch as the tears slip silently down his face. 

 "Doing what?" I ask. He looks up at me, then glances at the IV. "This! Why are you marking your body and not eating and drinking so much to fill your stomach and over excercising?!" he responds, his voice raising as he waves at the IV then at me. I flinch away from him, the IV tugging at my arm, making me wince. "I don't understand, excercising and drinking a load of water is healthy." "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell. But what you are doing to yourself is NOT healthy. You're perfect the way you are, my love." he apologizes, scooting closer to me, placing a hand on my knee. 

 "I-I'm not doing anything. I'm in control, I know my limits, Will." I respond. "Baby..." he murmurs, kissing my forehead. He moves next to me, pulling me into his lap. I feel his tears hit my back and shoulders. I lean back into him, laying my head on his shoulder. 

 "Will, I know I have control, it's the only thing I do have control over in my life." I say quietly. "No, honey. You don't. You think you do, but trust me, you don't. Your mind is toxic, it's contorting what you see when you look in a mirror. You don't have to do this to yourself. You have control over other things in your life, even if you don't realize it. I promise you do." he says, kissing my temple. I shake my head. "B-But what if I get fat? You wouldn't love me then. I'd be even more disgusting. I'd be so much uglier than I already am." I ask, my eyes burning. He turns me to look at him. "No, Neeks. I love you no matter what. You're perfect already. Your weight, height, whatever, doesn't matter to me. You're beautiful no matter what. Nothing will ever change that. Nothing will ever change how much I love you. I promise on the River Styx." he says, kissing my hair. I look down at my hands, as the tears fall. He just made a promise that he won't be able to keep. He's going to eventually realize what a disgusting freak I am, just like everybody else.

 "No, don't do that. You won't be able to keep that. You'll eventually figure out how disgusting and how much of a freak I am. Trust me." I mumble, the tears falling faster. He gently puts his hand under my chin, lifting my face to look at him.

 "You're not a freak, and you're definatley not disgusting. New rule, everytime you say something bad about yourself, I'm gonna make you say 3 nice things about yourself, 'kay? That starts right now, by the way." he murmurs, kissing my nose. "No. I-There isn't anything." I say, my face heating up a little. 

 "Yes, there is. Now go." he replies. I shake my head. "No." "Pleeeeeeassseeeeeeee, babe? For me?" he asks, giving me puppy dog eyes. (A/N: NO NOT IN THAT WAY, I SWEAR TO THE GODS!)

 I roll my eyes, giving in. "Fine. I guess, I have umm, posture when using a sword." "Good! 2 more!" he says, kissing my cheek. I laugh at his childishness.

 "Erm, I suppose I'm pretty good at drawing... and I guess my hair is pretty okay." I finish, looking up at Will. 

 "Thank you, Death Boy! I know it's stupid but it will eventually work and you'll stop saying bad things about yourself." he says, kissing me.

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Will

I pull away from Nico, squeezing his torso a bit, kissing his forehead. "I love you." I mumble. "Ti amo, tesoro." he replies, laying his head inbetween my shoulder and neck. I shift a little so we're both lying down. 

 "Is your IV comfortable?" I asks softly. he looks up a me, a small smile playing on the corner of his lips. 

 "Is an IV ever comfortable?" he asks. I chuckle, kissing his nose. "Fair enough, but is it pulling at your hand?" He shakes his head, snuggling closer to my side. I squeeze my arms around him gently, watching as his eyes close. 

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Hi, yeah, so there is gonna be another part, this is not the end because shit is about to blow up, sorry, lol thats a lie. Baaaaiiiiiiiii