Captured Effortlessly (Ain't Nobody)

Chapter 9 - You Filled My Heart with a Kiss

"I can't do this anymore."

Can's words still haunted the absolute silence of the living area of Tin's condo.

You could have heard a pin drop.

Tin stared at his friend in shock, and Can... was quietly sitting on the sofa next to Tin.

He didn't seem to know what to do with himself after his outburst.

They had met in Tin's condo because Can had wanted to show him another relaxation technique he could use to find sleep. They were so comfortable with each other by now that they often preferred to meet in the privacy of Tin's condo, rather than in public places, so they could talk to each other unafraid.

And now... Tin's mind was going blank, completely erased – and it felt like his heart stopped.

Not that it had really stopped, he could sense it pound in his chest faster than usual, but maybe... he would want it to stop.

Why?

What was wrong with their friendship?

Tin had talked to Pete recently, and he had concluded that he could try and be bolder, maybe bring up... stuff again, figure out if Can might be interested in being more than his friend... a special friend, at the very least.

Now this.

Can couldn't... he couldn't leave him.

It wasn't fair.

Tin had opened up to him, he felt so comfortable with him.

He couldn't...

Tears started to fall from his eyes unhindered, and Tin was afraid that he would soon dissolve into a sobbing mess, if he didn't control himself.

"Shhh," there was a warm hand on his cheek, softly coaxing him to look in the direction he just couldn't stand to look at the moment, "shhh, Tin, I'm sorry! I didn't... I'm not leaving you! I didn't mean... I could never... I'm an idiot sometimes. I-"

This made Tin tentatively turn his head, just a little, not all the way, not far enough to actually look into Can's eyes.

He wasn't leaving?

Then...

"I'm sorry. I'm actually... What I meant..."

Tin had rarely heard Can like this, stammering, searching for words, and Tin was confused.

"I like you, Tin. So much. I like spending time with you. I like being with you. And I can't pretend that we are just normal friends. I can't do that anymore. You're too important to me."

Now Tin's heart, that he had wanted to stop just before, was beating so fast that he thought he could hear it.

He finally dared to look at Can... beautiful, serious... and currently really anxious Can.

"I like you, too. I just thought you didn't want..."

Can shook his head.

"I tried so hard to contain my feelings... but I can't. Not anymore. But... ah, I've never been... this... is all new to me. I've never felt... like this, before. About anyone. And I'm lost."

Tin didn't even try to hold his tears anymore.

He had no idea what he felt right now. He was... relieved, that Can felt the same, that Can wanted more. That it was finally all coming out. But he was also scared... because he had been relying on Can for so many things, Can had always seemed so in control of everything – and now he was admitting that he was lost.