Reckless Hearts

Chapter 29

You realised when you woke up the following morning, that Dutch hadn't come to bed last night. There was no warm embrace, to be woken up to. If he'd wanted to punish you, then he'd succeeded.

He wasn't even there to scold you for getting up when you should be resting.

You kind of felt sorry for Molly. You wondered if this is how she felt, when she'd been shoved aside for you to take her place.

It was funny, he never mentioned that he loved Molly. Maybe it was one sided. You were pretty sure that Molly must have loved Dutch. It was easy to love him though, especially when you were getting his attention. Not so easy when you weren't.

You pulled on your jeans and boots. You walked over to the chest. The package containing the new clothes that he had bought for you in Valentine, was still there, where you had thrown it. You pulled out one of the new blouses, and put it on.

You found your gun belt draped over a chair, and quickly buckled that on too.

As you walked out the tent, you looked around, it was late, but there was no sign of Dutch, Hosea or Arthur.

You grabbed some stew, and sat by the edge of the lake, you figured you had some thinking to do.

Even with the breeze off the lake, it was hot and humid. Your shoulder was still sore, so you decided, to sit on the end of the jetty. You took your boots off, and dangled your feet in the cool water. Kicking the water around, watching the ripples make patterns on the lake.

You heard footsteps on the Jetty and looked around.

You were disappointed to see it was Mrs Adler, when you'd hoped it might be Dutch. Hoping that he might be missing you, like you were missing him.

You'd only really seen Mrs Adler once, up in the mountains, when Dutch and Arthur had brought her in.

She smiled, "mind if I join you?" she asked.

You shrugged, "sure."

She held her hand out, "Sadie Adler,"

You shook it, "Kara Finlay," you said, introducing yourself.

"How you doing?" she asked, "You've been through it, a bit ain't ya," she acknowledged.

You rolled your eyes, "Ya could say that, but I heard you haven't had it so good either," you concluded.

She nodded. "You and me, we got the same enemy I reckon. If you're gonna go searching for that bastard Colm O'Driscoll, you can count me in." she hissed.

You shrugged, "I ain't."

Sadie frowned, "What d'ya mean you ain't? After what he done to you. Don't you want revenge?"

You pointed at your shoulder, "That's what revenge got me, and an empty bed," you sighed. "friend of mine told me 'a man who desires revenge should dig two graves'. Guess that goes for women too," you added.

Sadie shook her head, "I thought you had a fire about you Kara. I didn't figure you for the giving up type."

You kick the water with your foot, "I ain't givin' up Sadie, I want to see Colm O'Driscoll dead as much as you do, I just ain't prepared to die for it. Not right now any way."

Sadie stood up, "Don't ever confuse living with existing Kara. If you change your mind, you know where to find me!"

You watched Sadie walk away, towards the camp fire.

You finished eating your stew, the stood up. You put your boots back on. In a way Sadie was right, you needed to live, not just exist. But Hamish, he was right about revenge. But so was Dutch. You had a funny feeling that if you'd agreed with Sadie, you'd now be riding out with her to find Colm. You'd learnt a lot, over the past few weeks, since meeting Dutch. One thing you did know, that running off to do something without thinking it through, was the wrong thing to do. But nor could you just wander around here for the rest of your days doing nothing.