Only Ocean

Part 38

*Warning this chapter contains mature content*

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Meghan Polinsky's POV.
Day 26, dawn

I froze.

What. The. Fuck.

I stared at the closed wood door in front of me. "W-What." I said hearing my voice shake. He did not just say what I think he did. I was waiting for him to laugh at me. Say something like 'you thought I don't want you.' Or something similar. I've never been so self conscious of a choice before. I never really been with someone so intimately. So close together. I really like Lucas and doing things and maybe even things this far don't really seem to bother me. I mean, I'm no virgin, but my first time sucked. The guy lied to me about not being a virgin then told me after that he lied about not being a virgin. While he-wait for it- cried. Yes, you heard me. He cried after sex. So much for self confidence.

And I'm not even done yet. The sex lasted 3 minutes! There wasn't even foreplay, he just shoved his snake in my chamber of secrets and pulled out and rolled over. His bed and room was dirty and what made it worse, his cat watched the whole time.

I've never had sex since and that was six years ago, I barely even kissed a guy...Nico wouldn't let me... go further when we did...I'm such a joke- Well I mean I'm not saying I'm going to have sex with Lucas-oh my god why am I still thinking! Answer him don't just stay quiet. Oh my god. I'm sure my face is on fire right now.

"You heard me. Take a bath with me." He repeated. I heard a shuffling and suddenly he was behind me. This is so not the Lucas I'm used to.

I felt his hand at my hip. I sucked in a breath. "Lucas..." I said in a quiet voice. I knew I loved him but we've never said that to each other. What does this mean then? He's kissed me before but we've never talked any further about it. I knew we both like one another too.

His hand trailed from my hip to my waist. From my waist to the top of my spine. I felt his fingertips go to the back of my neck. He lightly pushed my hair to the side. I didn't move the whole time, I just invaded my self in his warmth. I closed my eyes and leaned back into feeling relaxed. "Take." He said and placed a kiss on my shoulder. "A bath." He kissed my now exposed neck. "With me?" And finally placed a kiss behind my ear.

I swallowed hard. "Lucas I don't think we should..." I said barely above a whisper. When I didn't finish he spoke again. More cautiously this time. "I won't touch you...or I mean you don't have to no pressure." He said stepping back. No pressure? No pressure! God calm down Meghan. First think. Lucas would never hurt you and really like him. And I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about him in this kind of situation... I love his lips on me and I want more. I crave more...

Is this what I want?

"Meghan please say something." Lucas said grabbing hold of my hand. "I'm sorry I don't know why I did that if your not comfortable you have my word, I'll back off I just..."

Suddenly I've made up my mind. I reached forward towards the door.

My hand hovered above the handle.

Click.

I locked the door and spun around. Lucas was looking down but suddenly looked up at my sudden action. He stared at me with a blank expression. I started breathing hard. I saw his chest rising and falling too. I took a step towards him. Then another. I saw something change in his eyes and a small smile graced his lips. He took a large step forward and grabbed my hips. I was pulled into him and he smashed his lips to mine in a feverish kiss. A desperate one, like he needed me to live. Like I was his only source of life to keep going. It was a rough kiss. A mind reeling kiss that I would memorize, remember forever.