Queen of the Headphone Zombies

Cacophony

*This is part 1 of a double update! Keep scrolling for part 2, Bridge!!*

Airplanes // B.o.B. ft. Haley Williams of Paramore

EMERSON

I jump out of my Audi, cringing as I set the alarm because the horn startles me every damn time, and untie my tie as I walk up to the door. I wrap the tie in a ball and shove it in my pocket.

Won't be needing this anymore.

I ring the bell and hear, "Hang on, handsome!" yelled from inside the house. A half a second later the door flies open and a hand flies out, grabbing me by the lapel and dragging me inside.

"Um, no." Chelsea looks me up and down then slams the door shut. "Not appropriate, Em. Where'd the tie go? There had to have been a tie." She doesn't wait for me to answer before her hands are digging into pockets left and right. Chelsea finds it on the second try.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down, Blondie." I pull my tie out of her hands. I've walked into sheer Chelsea madness. "What the hell? I thought we were going Sid Vicious tonight?"

Nodding her head as her grabby hands go back in for the tie, she snatches it again, the little she-witch with her quick reflexes. Before I can react, she leans forward on her tip toes and throws it around my neck.

"Yeah, yeah, don't worry. As soon as we take this selfie you can dump the tie and we'll head to Zoe's." And the whole time she is talking she is not giving me a chance to say no. Instead her quick as lightning fingers wrangle the tie into the perfect knot before I can get a word in.

I finally find my voice. "What selfie? Chelsea, I really don't have the patience for your language disorder tonight." Also known as her inability to explain anything. Ever. "I'm already tied up in knots and my nerves on edge about this gig." She reaches up to adjust the tie again and I slap her hands back. "I can't translate crazy on top of you freaking the fuck out." I put my hands-on Chelsea's shoulders in an attempt to keep her still. It's effective in getting her to stop the perpetual motion and she seems to finally process what I was saying.

Oh, she's processed it all right. But what I said did not go down well. Her eyes get that sad look and her mouth curves down into a pout. Apparently, I've hurt her feelings. Sheesh, the drama with this one.

But Chelsea is never capable of holding onto one emotion for too long. She gives me a cheeky grin and says, "Awww, is little Emerson scared? It will be just fine," she pats my cheek, "I promise. Just put your arm around me and smile for the camera and we will be on our merry little way."

Chelsea pulls up her phone and opens the camera app. That's when I notice how dressed up she is. And I am talking not dressed up in a costume like I figured. Chelsea has gone all out. She's in an all black lace dress, her hair is pulled up in a curly do, and she's got sparkles all over her face. I look closer, yep that's glitter all over her face making her sparkly like some dark fairy princess.

"Whaaa-" I can't finish my confused outburst because she grabs my arm and throws it over her shoulder. Then next thing I know, she's got her arm extended making an attempt to get us into the photo frame.

"No! Wait! WTF is going on, Chelsea?" I step away and grab her phone.

She gives a long sigh. "Ok, it's obvious your family has communication issues."

"What?" I have no idea what this chick is on. Oh, right we have been over that before, Chelsea isn't on anything, the girl is just nuts.

Chelsea shakes her head and reaches for the phone, but I'm holding it up over my head, way out of reach for a smurf in a black lace dress and Doc Martins. Who wears Doc martins with a lacy dress?