The Master of Me

Chapter 20

Chapter 20

                Alue’s heart rejoiced upon hearing Sterling speak. She had been gone a mere seven days, but to her it had felt much longer. She had missed the sound of his voice, his warm, natural, apple wood musk, the grasp of his hand in her own, and the warmth of his presence.

“I’m sorry about the window.” She mumbled, awkwardly trying to sort through the turmoil of emotions residing within. She had tried to run away and ultimately her feelings for Sterling and pulled her back. She had watched and waited before coming back. Making sure the house wasn’t being watched by a private investigator for Vincent. Now she was here and didn’t know what to do or say to Sterling that would make this whole situation better.

It was in her moment of pondering thoughts that Sterling sat up and hugged her, “Forget the window. You are back and safe. That is all that matters to me.”

For a moment, Alue simply relaxed in his embrace, feeling the caring in his words and actions. Then reality came back to her mind. The thought of leaving this place and leaving Sterling’s presence forever hurt more than any physical torment she had ever endured. However, she knew staying was not an option, Vincent would surely get her.

She pulled away from their embrace to look into Sterling’s deep blue eyes, “I couldn’t leave you without saying . . .  goodbye.” She whispered, closing her eyes and then placed her lips against his. Every memory with him and the emotions behind them all fueled her need to show him just how much she cared about him with that one act. How grateful she was for everything over the past five months. How he had healed a part of her she had once believed to be unfixable. Then sorrow filled her soul as she figured this was their final moments together, never would she see him again. Tears rolled down her cheeks and fell onto his, causing Sterling to pull away and look into her eyes. Such sorrow was unlike any other he had ever seen from her eyes, as he had seen glimpses of her soul on occasion.

“Do you trust me?” Sterling asked Alue, his voice surprisingly unwavering, as his heart beat raced like it needed to make up for the seconds it forgot to beat when her lips connected with his.

Alue nodded her head and then remembered that his human eyes probably could not see such a gesture. “Yes.” She told him, her voice revealing the quiver of sorrow and the verge of more tears that she was barely keeping at bay.

 “Alue, these past five months have been incredible. I will cherish every moment we have in my heart and mind. My feelings for you have grown into more than that of a guest in my home or a friendly neighbor. I understand you’re scared of your past catching up to you. You are not alone anymore; you don’t have to keep running. Will you reconsider your decision and stay with me?” Sterling asked her, understanding the terror that she must be going through with ‘him’ showing up at Sterling’s front door a week ago.

                Alue didn’t know what decision to make. Her heart nearly leapt out of her chest when she heard Sterling say how much she meant to him. Yet, the terror of ‘him’ coming to the front door again, this time perhaps with an officer of the law, to take back what was rightfully his was nearly too much for her to bare. She had come to say goodbye in the dark of the night to avoid Sterling seeing her sorrow at telling him goodbye. Now he had successfully made it worse. In her mind Victor Gregory was invincible. He always got what he wanted and right now she was his target. She did not believe Vincent would sell her rights away to Sterling, even if the accountant offered a large sum of money. It was only a matter of time before she would return to her past. If she ran now she had a chance of slipping away from Victor once again. However, running would be just as painful as returning, for she was leaving behind this man she had come to care for and enjoy being. In that moment she decided she would no longer run, like she had originally planned. But stay with Sterling and enjoy whatever time she had left with him before they would inevitably become separated.

“I will stay.” She whispered to him, her voice no longer quaking with sorrow, but laced with happiness at the whatever time she had left to spend with him. Sterling smiled ever so wide and pulled her into a hug. “I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe and happy, Alue. You have my promise and my heart.”

A thought entered her mind on what she else she could do to show Sterling how much he meant to her. Words didn’t mean much to her, but actions were another matter. She kissed him again, this time with just as much affection, but it carried an undertone of need and desire she had never felt before. She wanted him in ways that were more intimate then just the kiss they now shared or when they held hands. She could feel her heart race in her chest and her insides coil with pleasant anticipation as the kiss became more urgent and heated. She felt his hands slowly caress across her cheek, brush her ears, travel down her neck, along her back, and come to a stop at her hips. Her body now resenting the thick comforter blanket, along with the clothes she wore, that separated them from connecting skin to skin.

She reluctantly pulled away from their kiss and scoot up so she was no longer under the thickness of the comforter blanket. With her legs straddling his hips she noted Sterling wore flannel pajama pants and no shirt, making it easy for her to gaze over his physic with a smirk of grin at his attractive body. Her hands caressed the toned flesh of his torso, hearing his breath intake with a note of pleasure, while she leaned in once again to kiss him more. What surprised her was his own hand coming up, she half expected him to begin removing her shirt or go underneath to feel her own flesh. Instead his fingers gently came to her lips, stopping her from getting any closer to his.

“No.” Sterling’s voiced his breath still quick from their heated moment.

Alue’s eyes furrowed in confusion and her tail dropped, “What do you mean, ‘No’? Am I not good enough for you in this manner? Your voice says no, but other signals say differently.” She told him, scenting his arousal as well as her own.

Sterling sat up and scooted back close to the headboard of the bed, feeling his head clear some more at the cool temperature of the wood against the skin of his back. Alue now sat on his legs but at least he could think clearer and see her now that his eyes had adjusted to the darkness.

“This is not what I meant when I said stay with me. Be assured my objection is not about you. When the right time comes I will not object, but until then be content with the way we are.” He tells her, hoping she didn’t take this the wrong way.

Alue took a moment think about this situation. She was confused as to why any male, even as one as honorable as Sterling, would refuse such an invitation. He had already said his feelings for her and she had showed how much she trusted and cared for him. What else was he waiting for? She had not been given the choice of who had taken such virtue from her. And now she found someone for the first time in her life, wanted to be intimate with and he was saying no. Fear in the back of her mind of Vincent showing up and taking her away, with Alue never being able to share this kind of experience with Sterling. Sterling sounded so confident that she would still be around long enough for his ‘right time’ to come. Disappointment glided across her features as her ears fell forward and her shoulders dropped,

“I do not understand your reasons behind this objection, but I will respect your decision Sterling. May I at least rest with you for the remaining minutes we have before sunrise?” Alue asked of him. Sterling nodded and Alue got up off his legs and lay down beside him. They were both plenty warm so Sterling threw off the comforter and covered up with the bed sheet, only to find his companion entirely furry and canid as she scooted herself against his side.

 “Thank you, Alue.” He told her, his eyes closing for the remaining minutes as the sunlight began to filter through the window as he stroked her head softly.