Secret Admirer

Chapter 8: Two Days

Two days. It's been two days. Two days since Marinette wrote a letter, two days since she's received a letter and two days without any visits from Chat Noir. Not like Marinette had been thinking about it or anything, but it's been two days. It felt like forever though.

So much was on her mind, but all she's realized was the passing of time. Marinette thought of every situation with Adrien and Chat Noir. Should she be sad, mad, happy, glad? She didn't know. Marinette couldn't really describe her feelings. She wasn't entirely sure if she wanted a letter or if she wanted to see Chat Noir or if she just expected them. None of it made sense. Or at least not to her.

Marinette was laying over the edge of her chaise, her hair loose. She rolled her red tomato pin cushion between her palms nervously as she tried to make sense of her situation.

Should she write? Should she not? Which was better? Should she forget Adrien? Should she move towards Chat Noir? Marinette still liked Adrien and she actually enjoyed Chat Noir's visits, but she did believe Lila in a way. Lila is undeniably a liar and a manipulative person. There was no doubt about it. But she did have a point. Adrien never liked her, so why would he now? It's been three years and Adrien never thought of her as more than a friend. He's nice but that's it. This whole situation doesn't seem like something he'd do. He's Adrien Agreste and he has far better things to do than bother with her. They've gone on school trips together, picnics, and she even kissed him once, even if she thought he was a statue in the moment. But still, he never looked at her a different way. After all they've been through, it was still the same. So how could a simple letter change his mind? Marinette wasn't exactly the person to woo someone easily and she doesn't have a way with words. What would make him like her?

And Chat Noir, what was up with him? He never made sense, but now he just confused her. She never fully understood him as Ladybug and last time she remembered, he was in love with Ladybug. So why does he get so close to Marinette? Why does he flirt with her? Why would he do all of this? Because he's Adrien's best friend? That excuse didn't sit well with her. It seemed too basic for this situation.

"Ugh!" Marinette threw her pin cushion at the wall and sat up. "Why?" It was all too much. Too many questions and too much to think about. It was killing her. She felt pressure on her life to think it through, but she just couldn't.

"Did you decide yet, Marinette?" Tikki asked, flying over to her.

"No." Marinette cried, holding her head. "I don't know what to decide! What am I even deciding?!" Tears pooled from her eyes. "Deciding whether to stop writing? Deciding if Adrien actually likes me? Deciding if Chat Noir is the one writing these instead of Adrien? Deciding if I'm mad?" Marinette cried into her hands. She sniffled. "I was sad before, but now I'm kind of mad and I I . . . I don't know what I'm feeling, Tikki. I don't know what I'm supposed to feel anymore. I don't know what I'm supposed to think and I don't know how to process it."

"Take your time, Marinette. You don't have to make any decisions right now." Tikki consoled. "If you need a break to collect your thoughts, then do it. Worry about yourself for a day."

"Keep your confidence." His wide grin and advice stained her memory. It frustrated her, but gave her an idea.

Marinette wiped her nose. "I think I know what I need to do, Tikki." She got up and walked up over to her desk. She opened a drawer full of tools and pulled out a screwdriver. Marinette headed up to her balcony and climbed up. She stood and stared at the black mailbox. The shiny box was so new. Without any letters inside but full of memories. "I have too." She whispered.

Marinette tightened her grip on the screwdriver and moved to the box, unscrewing every screw. She held the box for a second before ripping it off of the railing. Marinette released a breath she didn't know she was holding.

Tikki flew through the trap door. "Are you sure about this, Marinette?"

Marinette shrugged. "No." She walked past her kwami and back to her room. She opened the giant pink storage chest at the end of her stairs and stuffed the mailbox inside. "I can forget about all that now." Marinette sat on the chest. "No more letters."

"Are you sure?" Tikki asked.

"Yeah." She took a deep breath. "For now."

"Maybe I should I write in my diary." Marinette suggested. "It might help me release some of this stress." She hopped off the chest and grabbed her pink lock box off of her desk before she headed up to her bed.

"That would probably be better." Tikki said.

"And maybe take a nap." Marinette said, collapsing on the covers. "I'm actually feeling quite exhausted. Maybe I'll take that nap first and calm down a little."