In New York City

The Morning After

Me and Monica were busy trying to make a drink in the blender , i was busy chopping Strawberries as Rachel came out the bathroom .
"Hey " both me and Monica said at the same time
"Hey" Rachel said joining us in the kitchen .
"How was the big Anniversary dinner ?" Monica asked her
"Well we never actually got to dinner " she admitted
"Oooo nice " I smirked at her
"No we kinda broke up instead " she said
"What?!" Me and Monica practically shouted , due to the commotion she accidently started the blender which didnt have a lid on . So fruit now covered both me and Monica and over multiple objects in the apartment including the ceiling .
"God Monica its on the ceiling " Rachel said looking at the fruit splattered on the ceiling .
"Thats okay this is more important than fruit " she paused "on my ceiling !" She said angrily and i rested my hand on her arm .
"Not the time " I say
"You broke up ?" I asked her while Monica cleaned the fruit off her Jumper .
"Yeah but its okay because when Ross left Mark came over "
"Oh no " I said
"Rachel you and Mark ?" Monica asked
"No no its okay calm down . Mark and I talked and i realised how much i love your stupid brother and cousin and yeah weve got our problems but i really want to make it work " she said . Meanwhile she went and got herself ready for work , Chloe came out of the shower in Ross' apartment .

Later on once I got back from work , I headed back to Mons apartment .
" how am I gonna get the banana off my ceiling ?" She says studying it
"Ive got an idea " i say running and getting the mop "here try this " i say as i hand it to her . Monica started to mop the ceiling .
"Oh thank god its working "
"I thought you would have thought of that , your a clean freak after all "
"Im not a clean freak " she says loudly as she scrubs the ceiling making me laugh. The door opened and Phoebe came in carrying a box .
"Hey " Phoebe said
"Hey Pheebs "
"Why are you mopping your ceiling ?" She questioned
"Oh there was banana on it " i tell her
"Wow i have the spirit of an old Indian woman living in mine " Phoebe said making me nod my head .
"Oh Monica the mailman was downstairs so i brought up your mail " she said putting it down on the kitchen table .
"Oh good . Thanks " she said putting the mop down
"No what is Fabutec?" She said reading the box
"Okay all right dont judge me too much . Okay um but i saw this info-mercial and um i swear to you i have never ever bought anything on TV before except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing , it just looked so amazing .." Monica trailed off .
"Waxine !" Phoebe says excitedly
"Yes! Have you seen it ?"
"Oh its so incredible ! I so want to be a waxine girl "
"I know !"
"Do you think it really doesnt hurt ? Cause how can they do that ?" I ask
"Hello! Organic substances recently discovered in the depths of the rain forest !"
"They have the best stuff in there " Phoebe says excitedly
"Right i say we try this out " i say and Monica takes the box into her bedroom . Monica heated all the wax and prepared all the stuff . Phoebe started reading out the instructions .
"After applying the Waxine and linen strips to leg number one "
"Did that !"
"Grasp one of the linen strips by its easy to grab tab and pull it off in one quick pain free motion"
"Okay" Monica said gripping the tab and then she pulled it off in one quick motion " Ow !!!! Ow - oh - oh ! "
"Was it not pain free ?" Phoebe asks making me look at her confused
"No it was painful . Oh my god they should call it Pain-zine now with a little wax "
"Huh well the girls inthe satin nighties on the commercial dont seem to think its that bad " i say to her
"Thats because their nerves are probably deadened from being so stupid but hey y'know if you dont believe me please be my guest " so me and Phoebe pulled off the strips and instantly regretted it .
"Ow ! Oh my god !"
"Now are you glad we didnt start with the bikini strips "
"But weve still got the rest of these to do " i groan looking at the other strips on all our legs . The three of us prepared to pull the others off.
"Im just going to do it " i say as i quickly pull one off , the two others followed in my steps . There was a few shouts and screams and a few curses from me .
"Ow!" Monica and Phoebe screamed thankfully i had already pulled the rest of mine off . All of a sudden the door opened and Joey and Chandler came rushing in , Joey was holding a pan and Chandler was holding a kettle .
"We're all right " Phoebe said and they lowered there so called weapons
"Its okay its okay " i say "lower the weapons " i joke
"We were just waxing our legs " Monica said
"Off ?"
"For your information this happens to be a pain like no man will ever experience " Phoebe said with a bit of sass .
"Yeah well i dont think you can make that statement unless youve been kicked in an area that God only meant to be treated nicely " Chandler said
"Yeah i think that women just have a lower threshold of pain than men thats all. I mean come on its just a little wax " Joey backs Chandler
"Oh yeah come here " i say and Joey comes towards me so i quickly put a bit of wax and a strip on his arm .
"Oh thats mature " Chandler rolls his eyes
"Be quiet Bing , what was you gonna do with that Kettle ?" I say crossing my arms .
"Well i didnt know if you fancied Tea " he said making me laugh slightly .
"Okay so what now i just pull it off ?" Joey asks
"Uh huh " Phoebe said and Joey laughed before pulling the strip off his arm and squealing when he did so . After this we heard Ross trying to get Rachel to let him in the apartment . Chandler shut the bedroom door .
"What?" Monica said notcing him closing the door
"Nothing , nothing " Chandler said suspisciously . Monica went over to the door pushing her ear against it .
"Rachel said everything was okay "
"What , what are they talking about ?" Phoebe asked Joey . Eventually we heard Rachel shout " Ross you had sex with another woman !" Making me , Phoebe and Monica gasp .
"Oh my god " i say in shock
"I knew something had to be wrong because my fingernails did not grow at all yesterday " Phoebe informed us
"Yeah well i guess they had a fight and he got drunk... " Chandlee trailed off
"Oh ! You guys knew about this and didnt tell us " Monica said before hitting them both on their heads .
"He has sex and we get hit for it " Chandler complained to Joey rubbing the back of his head . Everyone gathered by the door trying to listen to what was going on out there .
"Y'know what i want you to leave ! Get outta here !" Rachel shouted
"No "
"Just get out . Now !"
"No i wanna stay . I wanna talk about this "
"Okay ! All right . How was she ?" Rachel asked him
"Uh-oh" Chandler
"What?" Ross asked confused
"Was she good?"
"Dont answer that " Joey said as if it was obvious but knowing my cousin he doesnt know when to stop talking .
"Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it , lets talk about it ! How was she ?"
"She was ..."
"Awful ! Horrible !" Joey said waving his hand around
"She was not good . Not good " Chandler said
"She was nothing compared to you " Joey carried on
"She was different" Ross replied making all of us wince . The arguing kept going on for quite a while .
"Y'know what i dont think we should listen to this anymore " Joey said and went to open the bedroom door but Monica stopped him . Me and Chandler sat down on the bed next to each other and Phoebe was sat on the floor chewing strands of her hair.
"What are you doing ? You cant go out there "
"Why not im hungry "
"Because they will know weve been listening " the arguing had gone on for a few hours more and i was pretty tired all the others were hungry so they started trying to eat the wax since it was organic and by the look on Joeys face he didnt think it was too bad .
"Theyre gonna get through this , arent they ?" Phoebe asked worried
"Yeah come on its Ross and Rachel , theyve got to"
"What if they dont ?" Monica put the idea out . Everyone went quiet for a second which was interupted by Joey .
"You think i need a new walk " he says making everyone confused . That was the last thing i remembered before i slowly opened my eyes to see Chandler .
"You decided to pass the time wisely " Chandler said looking worn out .
"What time is it ?" I ask him
"Four in the morning " he said making me groan "surely they still cant be arguing"
"They've been quiet for a long time " Phoebe said
"Maybe shes killed him " Joey suggested
"Lets go " Chandler says so all of us leave Monicas bedroom finally , once we left we saw Rachel asleep on the couch so Monica put a blanket over her . We waved goodbye and started walking out the apartment . Joey was walking all hunched over and his shoulders were bobbing slightly as he went .
"Is that your new walk ?" Chandler asked him
"No i really have to pee " he admitted both me and Chandler looked at each other disgusted. As we got into the hall Joey rushed into the apartment but Chandler waited and spoke to me "you gonna be alright walking to your apartment "
"I mean it is literally down the hall so i should be okay " i say sarcastcially "if anything happens ill know to call for you and the kettle " i joke before turning round and leaving him outside his apartment .