Homecoming Queen (Such a Shame, Shame, Shame)

Welcome to Purgatory

"SAVAGERRRRRRAAAAAA! WAKEY WAKEY!" Bam's eyes cracked open, his chin rested on Rikki's shoulder, her body curved into his. Rikki was still asleep, but Johnny and Amy smashing pans together outside would wake her soon enough. Bam pressed a quick kiss to her neck before rolling out of bed, Rikki whining in protest and dragging herself across to her trailer to get dressed.

"Oh my god they slept together. Guy time is slowly dying, and I with i-" Ryan was complaining loudly as a joke before Astrid put her hands on his cheeks and pulled him into a kiss.

"Shhhh. Hm, Bam was right, that is pretty effective." Ryan shrugged and Astrid grinned, Rikki and Bam appearing with Johnny and Amy.

"Amy, Rikki, assist us!" Johnny shouted, Amy and Rikki grabbing their respective clipboards.

"Bam's got a pitch for his new show."

"Johnny, you have a interview about the new movie with MTV." Ryan looked at Astrid.

"I need a pretty assistant lady." he said with a grin, Astrid chuckling and kissing his cheek.

"You know full well you have absolutely nothing on your agenda."

"Wooh hoo! My favorite kind of work. Come Astro, let us go back to the trailer and do nothing together!" Astrid chuckled and leapt up on Ryan's back, the two of them laughing and toppling over in the grass halfway back to the trailer.

"Miss Summers, I would be honored to carry you to the car." Johnny said with a big grin, Amy shaking her head.

"Why Mr. Knoxville, I believe you should see a specialist for your brain, But... HI HO KNOXVILLE! AWAY!" Amy jumped up onto Johnny's back and they darted for his rental car, Bam and Rikki chuckling at their friends.

"Adorable. Promise me you won't become a sappy bitch on me?" Rikki said, walking lazily beside Bam, her too-big tennis shoes scraping the pavement.

"Promised. Now come on, get your sweet ass in the Porche. You and I have a flight to catch."

"Wait a sec, it's just me and you?"

"Yup, me, you the Porsche and a drive to the airport before a week stuck in Vegas."

"You say Vegas like it's bad." Rikki said with a laugh, Bam starting the car and pulling away from the lot.

"Not that it in itself is bad. Going to Vegas with you is what concerns me." Bam stated, Rikki feigning shock.

"I'm a good girl thank you."

"Yeah, and I'm Tv's Ryan Dunn." Rikki and Bam laughed again before falling into silence for the rest of the drive. They arrived at the airport an hour later, fans swarming Bam upon their entry, leaving Rikki to check them in before pushing her way back to Bam.

"Hey watch it lady!" Rikki shot a glare at the teen who'd shouted at her and pushed to the front, tapping Bam on the shoulder.

"Ahem." Bam swiveled and smiled, Rikki grabbing him by the shirt collar and dragging him through the crowd. "Work first, fangirls later."

"But I have pretty fangirls..." Bam protested, Rikki not releasing his shirt until they were boarding their plane. "You're a meanie." Bam pouted as they took their seats, Rikki marveling at the first class compartment.

"The fifth time in my life on an airplane and I've never sat first class. This is awesome. Now I need a nap." Bam chuckled and got some wine, which was typical on these flights. He broke out a notepad and a red pen, writing down skits that would be funny for the film as Rikki drifted to sleep against him, head on his chest. "Bam." She grumbled in a voice barely above a whisper.

"What? Are you asleep again?" Bam questioned, receiving only his name murmured softly as a response. "That's just creepy Rikki." He said but smiled, stroking a hand across the tips of her hair, flattening them slightly and grinning wider. "Oh you're going to hate me when you're consious." He laughed lightly as Rikki didn't stir, just sleeping comfortably with her head rested against him. The flight was uneventful, Rikki sleeping until they landed while Bam got tipsy. They went to exit the plane, Rikki leaning off of Bam with a yawn, Bam opening one eye and looking around.

"Come on, we landed."

"We landed? I drank the whole time, time flies when you're drinkin' on an airplane. Hehe, flies, airplane...." Rikki shook her head and helped Bam out to the rental car, the scorching Nevada sun beating down on them. "We're staying at the Mirage, go there...." Bam mumbled, Rikki nodding and sliding into the driver's seat, starting the little grey sports car and driving out of the lot, Bam drooling on himself, knocked out in the passenger seat. The car rolled to a stop in the parking lot of the massive hotel, Rikki looking over at Bam, hooking a finger and putting it in his open mouth before yanking back sharply.

"Get up."

"OW! foGod damn! Your fucking razor blade nails just cut my cheek open!" Bam shouted, sitting up with his hand clamped over the side of his face, Rikki already outside of the car.

"It's hotter than Satan's ass-crack out here!" Rikki shouted, fanning herself as Bam dragged himself out of the car and inside to get the keys to their rooms.

"Uh, Margera?" The clerk nodded and handed Bam a key. "One room?"

"We only have you in the register for one sir." The clerk answered, Bam looking at Rikki, then back at the clerk.

"If I don't pass through here one morning, call the police." Bam sighed and walked to the elevator, Rikki walking in beside him.

"Bam, are you really so concerned that I'll kill you?"

"We're in the desert. They'd never find my body and you'd get off scott free. It's the perfect crime." Bam said with a laugh, leaning against the wall of the elevator as Rikki shook her head.

"I thought you'd be thrilled seeing as how you managed to spoon with me this morning." Rikki said, Bam flashing a wide grin as the elavator dinged.

"Spoon? No thanks, I'd rather Fork." He said, darting out of the elevator with a shouting Rikki close behind. "TOTALLY WORTH THE ASS-KICKING I'M GOING TO RECEIVE!" He shouted, unlocking the room and diving inside, laughing brightly and genuinely near the point of tears for the first time in years.