Breaking Hollywood [CAMREN]

Chapter 20

Camila

I'm an asshole.

A complete and utter fucking asshole.

I've hurt Speedy. The one person who didn't deserve to be hurt by me. The one person I didn't want to hurt, but I went and did it anyway. And I did it fucking spectacularly.

I saw the hurt in her eyes, and I put it there. It almost brought me to my knees.

I could barely look at her this morning, knowing I was going to hurt her.

And I know she thinks I've been fooling around with that blonde tonight, but I haven't.

I couldn't even if I wanted to. And I don't.

I just want Speedy.

She's been on my mind all day. I can't think of anything but her. How she tasted. How she looked in my bed. How she felt against me.

Knowing all these things makes me want her so much more.

I had to get out of the apartment today. I couldn't be around her. So, I lied and said I had meetings.

I didn't.

I called up some drinking buddies, and I was out all day.

But I knew I had to come home at some point, but being here, alone with her, just wasn't an option. I knew what would happen the second I saw her.

I wouldn't be able to stop myself.

So, I invited everyone back here. And I acted like the fucking bastard that I am.

But, now, she's gone, and I don't know where she is.

I'm worried. It's late. I don't want her and Gucci out alone.

I tried calling her, and it went to voice mail. I texted her, asking her to come back home, but she's ignored it.

Guess this is a taste of my own medicine for ignoring her text earlier and making her worry.

I cleared the apartment of everyone right after she left.

I want to go look for her, but I'm stuck because of my goddamn foot. I can't fucking drive.

And her car keys are still here on the coffee table, and so are mine, so she's out there, walking around.

I'm going to call the driver back and have him drive me around until I find her.

I've just pressed call on his number when I hear the elevator ping its arrival.

I hang up the phone and move toward the elevator.

She comes in with Gucci in her arms. Her eyes look red, like she's been crying.

You did that, asshole.

"Where have you been?" My words come out sharper than intended.

She puts Gucci down and walks past me without a word.

"Lauren, I asked, where the fuck have you been?"

She whirls around, her eyes narrowed. "What business is it of yours?"

"You live in my place. That makes it my business."

She laughs. "Fuck off, Camila. I was going to go in the morning, but screw this shit. I'm going now."

An emotion I don't recognize grips my chest.

"Don't be fucking stupid."

"You're stupid! And a gigantic asshole! And I'm out of here." She moves quickly through the apartment.